Wonderful to see you again, my friend. Welcome to my lair. Join me for some Wild Witch’s Brew. It is of course just my garden in Sherwood Forest, turning russet and gold in the twilight months of the year, enchanting but not enchanted. The brew is a long frothy drink of cocoa. Coffee if you prefer. And my goodness, aren’t you happy to see me (or you’re packing ammo)! That you’ve turned up today and with that…er…affliction…is marvellous because that’s precisely what I want to discuss (you don’t look surprised somehow).

Malaysiakini    reported Unromantic’ Dr M feels queer love in the air In the not-too-distant past, Dr Mahathir Mohamad had shocked his audience when he proffered a humorous lament about his Wet and wild  Penis  dying   before hims  to nudity are forgotten.Are Malayalee Indian men sex-mad? Do they have uncontrollable libidos which compel them to make unwanted and unwarranted sexual advances towards women, even at the risk of having their own reputations and careers ruined?Such questions became central to a study conducted by a group of international scientists following media reports about a retired Supreme Court judge and the editor of a well-known publication who, in their own ways, had allegedly behaved in what can euphemistically be described as an ‘inappropriate manner’ with young women.

That there is a lot of what presumably is consensual sex in India is evidenced by the country population of 1.2 billion, and counting. With so much of what might be called voluntary sex doing the rounds, why are there so many sexcapades – ranging from rape to stalking and other forms of harassment – in which women are the involuntary targets?

What made the matter even more puzzling for the team of scientists was that it was only Indian men who seemed to have hyperactive libidos. Indian women seemed perfectly normal in this respect, cases of males being sexually assaulted by females belonging to the man-bites-dog category.

The baffled scientists finally turned to genetics to find the key to the mystery. And it was deep inside the genetic structure of Indian males, encoded in their DNA, that they found the answer to their question.

It had long been known to medical science that all Indians have a genetic bias towards cardiovascular disorders and diabetes. Similarly, the scientists discovered a genetic aberration in the chromosome of Indian males which predisposed them to uncontrollable sexual urges.readmore http://clubdesexymind.blogspot.com/?zx=fd195891167cc7a2

The scientists named this genetic anomaly – which was not present in the chromosome of Indian females – MILTY and related it to another behavioural trait common to almost all Indian males but not to Indian females: the compulsion to do what in the vernacular is known as No. 1 in public.

Experiments conducted under laboratory conditions had shown that, given a choice, seven out of ten Indian males would choose peeing in public rather than in a conveniently situated, free-of-charge, hygienic loo. It is not that they want to pee in public, any more than any of the male sex offenders want to be sex offenders. It is just that they are genetically programmed to do so, once again thanks to the MILTY factor.

At a press conference in New Delhi which witnessed a record turnout, the leader of the team of scientists hinted that there had been talk of the researchers being awarded a Nobel Prize for their discovery, though it wasn’t quite clear whether it was to be the Nobel Prize for Medicine or the Nobel Prize for Peace, for having pinpointed a major cause of gender conflict in the subcontinent.

When asked to do so by a correspondent, the head scientist obligingly spelt out the mysterious MILTY which is at the root of the Indian male’s full-frontal sexual exhibitionism: Mine Is Longer Than Yours.

Malaysiakini reported  thank god! Dr Mahathir Mohamad’s penis dying before him.otherwise we will have like Kerala, no country for women!

Leaked Nude Sex Pictures Malay Scanda Do Malay cares about Virginity, lost it yet?readmorehttp://clubdesexymind.blogspot.com/2011/04/leaked-nude-sex-pictures-malay-scanda.html

Mahathir has no shame in admitting that  penis dying before him  not a philanderer? You will be surprised if you investigate his adventures soon after he became a politician. He used to travel quite often from Alor Star, where his wife and children were, to Kuala Lumpur and make a bee line to the University of Malaya students hostel and regularly take out a senior female student whose name had the initials AK. He probably was just as good at hiding his philandering as he was at hiding the USD44 billion that he stole from the Malaysians. Sex is an outcome but also often the cause of inflamed passions. Regulating sex through law has a downside because the adversarial, legal process we follow is pretty poor at establishing “guilt”. The police are so busy lining the roads for VIPs and doing crowd control, that investigating individual crime is a low priority. Shoddy investigations often do not result in meeting the tests for enabling the State to encroach on an individual’s liberty and life. This is especially so when public sympathy is not with the murderer.

Dominique Strauss-Kahn, at 62, has a notoriously active sex-life Advanced age is no reason to give up bedroomactivities,“Interesting, very interesting!” That was my reaction to the news that an NRI brother of a friend of mine was getting hitched. Before you deem it an inappropriate reaction—which in the first instance it is bound to seem—let me tell you why I reacted the way I did.Actually, he is a dynamic, ambitious and qualified young man with a highly paid job in the USA. and, therefore, a “prize catch”, if ever there was one. So his parents lived in constant dread of having a “firangi bahu” imposed upon them, but their son’s expressed wish to get him an Indian bride had quelled their fears and gladdened their hearts. And the search was readmorehttp://clubdesexymind.blogspot.com/search?updated-max=2013-10-04T19:31:00-07:00&max-results=7

Be it day or night, women in God’s Own Country no longer feel safe whether they walk on the streets or use the public transport.

Despite all the hue and cry regarding women’s safety, women in Kerala continue to live a nightmare. Whether you are married or single, young or old, every woman in Kerala who are out on the streets has a daunting tale to tell.

For former media professional, Gayathri Aravind, a walk from her office to her apartment, which is hardly a kilometre away, is now an ordeal. It was one incident that made her realise how unsafe a single woman like her in a state like Kerala is. While returning from her office around 9 pm, she was stalked by a man, who was making lewd comments at her. Though she turned back to signal a warning at him with a stare, he did not stop. Even as she hurried towards her flat, he followed her. Luckily, neighbours intervened and managed to throw him out of the apartment. Her ordeal did not end there. Everyone blamed Gayathri for returninghome late in the night, that too all alone.

Unfortunately, this is not a one-off incident in Kerala, where atrocities against women are on the rise with every passing day, and women now feel unsafe even during broad daylight.

Navya, a software professional in Kochi, who was previously based in Bangalore, says, “I moved to Kochi a year-and-a-half ago. I used to travel alone at night while I was in Bangalore. However, the way men stare at me here is unnerving. Even autos are not safe to travel in these days.”

Check the man’s marital status before going in for a live-in partnership was the loud signal from the Supreme Court which ruled that Domestic Violence Act could not be invoked by a woman in a live-in relationship with a married man, especially if she knew his marital status.

A relationship between a woman and a married man could not be termed a ‘relationship in the nature of marriage’, the basic requirement for an aggrieved woman in a live-in relationship to take recourse to DV Act for action against her ‘erring’ partner, the court said.

After giving this interpretation to live-in relationship between a married man and an unmarried woman, a bench of Justices K S Radhakrishnan and Pinaki Chandra Ghose said if the married man walked out of such a relationship, the woman was not entitled to seek maintenance under DV Act from him.

On the contrary, it warned, the deserted woman ran a risk of being sued for damages by the man’s wife and children for alienating them from the love and care of their husband/father.

But the bench was aware of the social reality of married men walking out of live-in relationships. Finding that in such situations, poor and illiterate women suffered the most, the apex court appealed to Parliament to take remedial measures through appropriate legislation.

One Indra Sarma had a live-in relationship with V K V Sarma, already married with two children. The man moved in with her, started a business enterprise with her and after several years, went back to his family.

After the live-in relationship ended, Indra moved a Bangalore court demanding from him a house, a monthly maintenance of Rs 25,000, reimbursement of her medical bills and Rs 3.50 lakh in damages.

The trial court found that the two lived together for 18 years. Finding the woman aggrieved, the magistrate directed the man to pay Rs 18,000 per month towards her maintenance under DV Act. The sessions court upheld the trial court decision.

But the Karnataka High Court set aside the trial court order saying the live-in relationship did not fall within the ambit of “relationship in the nature of marriage”, a cardinal principle for one to invoke DV Act.

Upholding the HC order, Justices Radhakrishnan and Ghose said, “We are of the view that the appellant (Indra Sarma) having been fully aware of the fact that respondent (V K V Sarma) was a married person, could not have entered into a live-in relationship in the nature of marriage.

“Appellant’s and respondent’s relationship is, therefore, not a ‘relationship in the nature of marriage’ because it has no inherent or essential characteristic of a marriage, but a relationship other than ‘in the nature of marriage’ and the appellant’s status is lower than the status of a wife and that relationship would not fall within the definition of ‘domestic relationship’ under Section 2(f) of the DV Act. Consequently, any act, omission or commission or conduct of the respondent in connection with that type of relationship, would not amount to ‘domestic violence’ under Section 3 of the DV Act.”

But the bench noticed the deficiency in law to address such relationships in which women, especially poor and illiterate, suffer the most when their partners -already married men – just walk out. The court said it was for Parliament to take remedial legislative steps to plug this loophole in law.

The bench said, “We have, on facts, found that the appellant’s status was that of a mistress, who is in distress, a survivor of a live-in relationship which is of serious concern, especially when such persons are poor and illiterate, in the event of which vulnerability is more pronounced, which is a social reality. Children born out of such relationship also suffer most which calls for bringing in remedial measures by Parliament through proper legislation.”

Despite the concern, the bench decided to go by the law and said, “If any direction is given to the respondent to pay maintenance or monetary consideration to the appellant, that would be at the cost of the legally wedded wife and children of the respondent, especially when they had opposed that relationship and have a cause of action against the appellant (the woman) for alienating the companionship and affection of the husband/parent which an intentional tort.”

In the popularly followed soap opera of the Aarushi and Hemraj double murders (murders committed in 2009; lower court judgment after six years in 2013), public sympathy seems to be with the murderers-Aarushi’s parents. The disgust is reserved for Hemraj, the male Nepali house help, whose sexual relationship with Aarushi, a minor girl, enraged Aarushi’s father to murder and her mother to be an abettor to the act.

Similarly, in 1959, Nanavati, a dashing naval officer confronted his wife’s lover and asked him if he intended to marry her. When the lover laughed in his face, Nanavati shot him with his service revolver. Public sympathy for the noble, husband, murderer and aversion for the lecherous, opportunistic, lover made the President of India pardon him.

In the ongoing Tejpal rape saga, public sympathy is with the victim, but it seems more than likely that she will not be able to meet the onerous legal requirements of proving him, or his abettor Tehelka managing editor Shoma, guilty in court. Tejpal and Shoma have yet to be arrested and Tejpal’s long term political association with the Congress will stand him in good stead, unless yet again Rahul takes a principled stand.

The Gujarat snoop gate in comparison has not attracted much public attention despite it providing a platform for Congress to attack Modi’s governance style. Possibly, the reason is that Modi is not the only chief minister using his state police to keep an eye on political opponents. After all, the woman whose privacy was invaded by the Gujarat State has not complained to anyone and her father seems to condone the action. The clearly established charge (for which no commission on enquiry is required) of misuse of public resources is an endemic “perk” across governments. Nevertheless it would be fitting, for a front running, Prime Ministerial candidate, like Modi, to sanction his assistant Amit Shah, who ordered the snooping, by distancing him from the 2014 poll preparations and fast forwarding the criminal charge process.

Trial by the media helps in getting people convicted fast, but it is never clear if the guilty have been punished. Similarly, judicial proclivity to rely on moral outrage rather than the facts on file, can distort justice. Sometimes, this judicial stance provides a convenient just-in-time outlet for widespread social outrage, with the intention of pushing upwards to appeal courts, the tricky business of handing out justice.

Things get confused in a transitional society, like India, where norms of sexual behavior vary enormously. Dress codes and sexual behavior in a night club are very different from the codes prevailing while shopping in a market. Normally the silos are water tight. Night clubbers dress and behave different when shopping. However, signals get mixed when, for example, a “memsahib” tired of her daring clubbing dress, hands it down to her maid, who promptly wears it, inappropriately, in the park, sending out unintended signals, identified by the “Khap Panchayat mentality” as the cause of inappropriate male behavior and defended so vociferously, by women, as their right to dress as they want. Without a doubt, the onus for a mental makeover is on men, who being socially dominant in India, hold women to account to a stricter code of sexual morality, than for themselves.

The rash of recent criminal legislation seeks to reverse this skew by holding men more rigidly to account for sexual transgressions. This is easier said than done. In Germany a recent legislation proposing to criminalize the customer (generally male) of a prostitute was opposed by prostitutes themselves. Their argument was that this would drive prostitution “underground”, make them more dependent on criminal intermediaries and expose them to dangerous customers. Unintended consequences indeed for a law which meant to do good.

Much the same is true of the spate of recent Indian legislation on sexual behaviour. Unintended consequences will mar these well- meaning laws. Here is how:First, it is difficult enough today for a woman to compete on-the-job with social norms requiring her to multi task between home and office. Effective team work often requires a high degree of intimacy and huge amounts of time spent together. Women are disadvantaged in “hanging out” and “networking” primarily because it is still very much a man’s world. The majority of bosses, at different hierarchical levels, are men. They are likely to be even less willing, than currently, to employ women competitively if even their innocent actions of workplace intimacy can potentially attract criminal sanctions. To put it simply, if today a woman has to be twice as good as a man to get the job, she will now have to be four times as good. Even the “strident voices” which campaigned for making the law on sexual transgressions more draconian, are now finding out how difficult it can be to implement the law effectively in their own offices. Women should be concerned about this additional barrier to their competitiveness.

Second, the notion of a woman as “innocent or naïve” and any man as a “predator” seems antediluvian. The law for sexual sanctions should be gender neutral. Consider for instance the gender biased law on adultery (the most common sexual transgression), where the man is presumed to be the adulterer, even if both parties are married. Similarly the law only regards men sexually harassing and stalking women, as criminals.

Third, laws must respond to the state of play of collectible evidence. It is difficult enough to prove motive but it is even more so to prove whether or not a sexual advance by a man was consensual or not. Oldies will remember the film, “Pakeeza”(1972), in which Raaj Kumar is instantly attracted to Meena Kumari’s ankles, resting on the iron window bars of a train. Only the Taliban would go to extent of banning the exposure of ankles. But it does illustrate how diverse and contextual are the sexual signals communicated between a man and a woman.

It is not for nothing that the eyes are the said to be the windows of the brain. Indian actresses, catering to our modern, prudish, sexual norms, have been adept at using minimalistic body language to convey powerful sexual signals. The lowering of eyes at an appropriate moment is understood to signal consent even if here is no verbal confirmation; playing with their hair is similarly a popular “I am interested” signal. All these are legitimate signals of the human mating dance. Also just as clearly the onus is on the male to calibrate his resultant advances, in a manner which is socially acceptable…and norms vary enormously depending on context.

Our laws are over wordy and over specified. This is a sure sign of a drafting process which gives too much weight to “satisfy” the demands of “strident voices” and “special interest groups”, rather than a professional balancing of the objectives of clarity, specificity, coherence and effectiveness.  Drafting good laws, which are forward looking, implementable and effective, is not our comparative strength. We use legislation just as a means to “shut the mouths” of discontents.

Lastly, lawmakers must assume that laws will be gamed by the unscrupulous; both men and women. This is the downside of the adversarial legal system we follow and its key limitation in harnessing social change. The US is a prime example where the fear of attracting “liability-civil or criminal” is so extreme that passers-by will not directly help the victim of an accident and instead wait for an ambulance to arrive for fear of attracting the liability of “legally” harming the victim.

Take a simple example. Increasing the age for becoming a legal adult from 16 to 18 for women is totally unrelated to the prevalent facts on the ground (UNICEF (2009) estimated that 47% of women in India are married in their teens). Dimple Kapadia was 16 years old in 1973 when she played the “quasi-Lolita”, title role in Raj Kapoor’s film; Bobby. Common sense would dictate that a fair proxy for adulthood is the average age of attainment puberty, rather than an arbitrary age, designed only to enlarge the pool of girls who would be “protected” by the more onerous sanctions against sex with a minor.

Finally, acceptable norms for social and sexual behavior must be left to be decided at the local level since the most effective threat against transgressions, is social sanctions. Pan-India laws are incapable of achieving this level of dovetailing between legal and social sanctions. It should then be left to people to vote with their feet and leave jurisdictions, whose social norms do not fit their world view. After all, India is increasingly a country of domestic migrants. Around 35% of the population has chosen to migrate, with the proportion increasing every year. Unacceptable social constraints and skewed gender roles (the Khap Panchayat world view) and unrealistic draconian laws (the social activist world view) would be just more (good) reasons to do so.

Move over,

ONE CAN NOW EARN A DIPLOMA IN SEX AT ‘THE WORLD’S FIRST COLLEGE OF APPLIED SEXUALITY’ IN MCA, PROVIDED YOU DO YOUR HOMEWORK.

ARE BREASTS A SEXUAL ORGAN BECAUSE NIPPLE STIMULATION IS AROUSING TO SOME WOMEN?

We have often been suggested that breasts have also a sexual function (besides breastfeeding) because nipple stimulation is arousing to some women – some think it is so in all women.