The idea that the criminaliztion of thought by the State does not affectt evidentiary  AVOIDING LIABILITY …. Anyone whose judgment has been impaired .

Now that a court has given its cachet of approval to the Special Investigation Team’s report absolving Narendra Modi of responsibility in the 2002 communal riots in Gujarat, one would expect the sting in the public discourse focussed on them to weaken, if not disappear altogether. That, however, is unlikely to happen any time soon. In the campaign leading up to the general elections, both supporters and detractors of Modi wouldn’t miss a single opportunity to trade bitter polemics.

Gujarat cop Sanjeev Bhatt’s revelations, contained in his affidavit filed before the Supreme Court, may come as a surprise to many. But for all those who lived in Gujarat during those fateful days and were in the thick of things, the contents only provide substantiation of what they had heard then. A top police officer of the state told me a couple of days after the riots started how director general of poice K Chakravarthy was uncomfortable on being told by Narendra Modi at a meeting to allow Hindus to vent their feelings.Though perturbed, Chakravarthy, a naturally timid person, could not muster the guts to stand up to his boss. So, instead he lamented to top police officers like the person to whom I had spoken. Or at least that is what the officer told me.
It was also being speculated that not only had “Hindus” been allowed to vent their feelings, they had been given “three days” to do this. Then defence minister George Fernandes who had been sent to Ahmedabad by Prime Minister Atal Bihari Vajpayee also knew of this “three days” and I personally can vouch for this. With a view to figure out what he was up to, I had called on Fernandes on Saturday, March 2, 2002, in Circuit House in Ahmedabad. Initially, I had some apprehension about how much time the minister would give me because he was on a mission and the riots were on full blast. But I was pleasantly surprised that he had all the time in the world for me. Very soon I could figure out the purpose Fernandes was so keen to engage me in conversation: he wanted to cross-check the facts of the riots that he had heard. It was a long three-hour meeting. At one point the chief secretary, G Subba Rao, and additional chief secretary Ashok Narain, along with a senior army officer, came into the room. They had been confabulating with the minister before I dropped in. Leaving them behind, Fernandes took me to his room. Now the officials wanted to know if they should wait or could leave. The minister asked them to leave and resumed his conversation with me. Fernandes spoke about a whole lot of things, how Ahmedabad had changed, how he had come to the city when there was a massive riot in 1969, how he had walked to the Governor Shriman Narayan’s house from the airport at that time, etc. With the evening advancing and the need for me to go back to the office, I excused myself. Fernandes persisted but I went out. As I climbed down the stairs, the defence minister beckoned me once again from the top of the stairs and said that I should have dinner with him. In the end, I retraced my path. While having an early dinner, Fernandes who was beating around the bush for so long suddenly let it out: “ I have heard that the rioters have been allowed three days time before any action is taken?” I shot back: “ Ya, I have also heard it.” The minister said: “Humm. I see.” We continued on the dinner silently. I must admit that there was no talk about the Modi meet about which Sanjiv Bhatt has now filed an affidavit. But very soon our meeting was broken. Harin Pathak, the minister of state for defence and the BJP MP from Ahmedabad and a hardliner himself, walked into the room with decisive steps and plonked himself on the sofa. In the manner that he walked in it seemed that Pathak was aware that we were having a long meeting and wanted to be privy to the conversation. Immediately after the dinner, I left the place.
A couple of months later, the Outook magazine ran an exclusive report on a serving minister of the Gujarat government having deposed before a citizens’ commission about the Modi meeting on the evening of January 27 where the chief minister had talked about allowing the Hindu reaction. The minister was not named but I instinctively knew that it was Haren Pandya. So I called Pandya and said: “So you tendered evidence before the commission?” Pandya demanded: “How do you know?” I said: “I can make out because you have told me this before. Though I am not sure about others because there is some speculation that it is Suresh Mehta ( another minister). But I am sure your boss Modi can make out too.” The minister said in a dismissive tone: “Who cares about him.” Then I told Pandya: “But your testimony is second hand. Why don’t you get me somebody who attended the meeting and confirm this to me?” Pandya thought for a moment and replied: “Chakravarthi (director general of police ) can.” I told him: “I don’t know him. But since you were close to him and once were his boss as home minister, why don’t you set up a meeting.” Pandya said: “Let me get back to you.” He was back on the line in 10 minutes. “I have spoken with him. Here is his cell number. You have to ask him the questions but he will answer only in yes or no. He is not willing to go any further.” OK, I said and kept down the phone. In the event I did not call up Chakravarthi. The reason: I had written an article for the edit page about the guilty men of Gujarat and had named Chakravarthi and this was going to appear in the paper the next day. I did not think it morally right to get information from a source one day and next day publish an article that would put him on the mat. Moreover, the prospect on a yes or no answer did not appeal to me.

Genocide in Gujarat

A few months later when I came to know of the names of officers who were present at that fateful meeting, I asked one of them about what had transpired. The officer, Anil Mukim, then private secretary to Modi and now a joint secretary to GOI told me: “Not while I was there.” My specific query was: “Did Modi say that a Hindu reaction be allowed?”. I noted from media reports recently that this is also exactly what Mukim told the SIT on the Gujarat riots. If I recollect correctly Ashok Narayan, the additional chief secretary (home) who had attended the meeting told the Nanavati Commission that there were instructions that the bodies of all those perished in the Godhra train carnage be allowed to be brought to Ahmedabad. This is what Sanjiv Bhatt has also said as part of his affadavit about what had transpired at the meeting.
Incidentally, it seems that on the evening of February 27 there were two meetings that had been convened by Modi. The first one was a law and order meeting with top cops and secretaries, which Sanjiv Bhatt is supposed to have attended. The other was a meeting of ministers. Haren Pandya had told me that at this meeting some of the ministers said that the bodies of those who died in the Godhra carnage be brought to Ahmedabad. Haren said that he resisted because he felt that this could lead to an outpouring of sentiments leading to a serious law and order situation. Pandya said that he was outshouted at the meeting and mentioned a minister (I am withholding the name, but it was not Modi) who said that this is what we want. “Our party strength is in Ahmedabad. We want everything to happen here. It will help our party.”
Haren Pandya was murdered under mysterious circumstances in early 2003, so he cannot come back to life to testify whatever is attributed to him by me. I am acutely aware of this. I am also aware that George Fernandes is suffering from Alzhiemer’s, a disease that robs its patients of all his memories.

For a start, Zakia Zafri, widow of former Congress MP Ahsan Zafri, a victim of the carnage, who unsuccessfully challenged the SIT’s clean chit to Gujarat’s chief minister and the BJP’s prime ministerial candidate, has vowed to appeal the judgement in a higher court. That is of course her legal right. Encouraged by those who have been advocating her cause, notably Teesta Setalvad, her determination to continue her search for justice would, at the very least, make sure that the ghosts of 2002 are not entirely banished into oblivion.
Meanwhile, the cases against a number of individuals alleged to have instigated the 2002 violence will continue to be heard in other courts. Their denouement too would fuel more controversy that, directly or otherwise, involves the BJP’s prime ministerial candidate. In plain words, unless these cases, like Zakia Jaffri’s appeal to a higher court, run their full course, which might take years, Modi’s conduct during the riots will continue to be held up to critical scrutiny.

To compound his problems, the UPA government announced on Thursday the setting up an inquiry commission to probe the alleged irregularities in the surveillance of a young woman architect by Gujarat officials ordered by Modi and his aide Amit Shah. Its terms of reference are wider than those of the commission that the Gujarat government has established for the same purpose. It will also cover “incidents of physical/electronic surveillance” also in Himachal Pradesh and the National Capital Territory of Delhi “allegedly without authorisation.”  In the former state, the commission will examine charges of snooping on chief minister Virbhadra Singh by the BJP government when he was the leader of the opposition and in the latter, the leaking of BJP leader Arun Jaitley’s call data records.

The fierce reaction of the BJP to the Centre’s move is par for the course. The party has dubbed it as a ‘political vendetta’ and a ‘witch-hunt’ and asserted that it infringes the ‘federal spirit’ of the Constitution. Jaitley has hinted that the decision could well be challenged in the Supreme Court. Its timing has also raised eye-brows. The Congress, however, seems prepared to brazen out these charges in the hope that the commission would indict Modi’s far from transparent role in the snoop-gate affair. Neither he nor Amit Shah have uttered a word to counter allegations that the snooping was carried out in flagrant disregard of due process.

Until and unless the commission establishes this fact beyond all doubt, the Congress too would be treading on egg shells. The risk it runs could well be counter-productive. It is hell-bent on painting Modi as the villain of the piece but might end up by projecting him as a victim of a sustained campaign of denigration. To be portrayed as such a victim might actually help Modi to rubbish the Congress as a party that resorts to desperate measures to counter his growing appeal in the eyes of the electorate.

Indeed, armed with the Ahmedabad Metropolitan magistrate’s clean chit to him, and even as he awaits the outcome of the snoop-gate investigation, the BJP’s prime ministerial candidate has a unique opportunity to refurbish his image. To drive home his ‘India first’ and ‘development of all’ mantras, he needs to reach out to the marginalised and alienated sections of the population. The sections include substantial number of Muslims. They need a place in the sun that Modi claims is shining resplendent on Gujarat. He might as well begin by convincing Zakia Jafri of his intent. Given its potent symbolism, a move in this direction could transform the legal victory he won on Thursday into a moral and political one as well. The alternative is more brim-stone and fire whose smoke shrouds the issues of genuine interest and concern to the electorate.Where politics decides everything and extinguishes the line between right and wrong? When I first heard of the conviction of former Gujarat minister Maya Kodnani and Babu Bajrangi in the Naroda Patiya case on Wednesday morning, my first reaction was: why is it that the associates of Narendra Modi get nailed every time but he …Read more

THE SHEER STRENGTH POWER OF BEING A WOMAN

Our love — even for those we are bound by blood to — has an essential element of duty to it. Most of the time, you do things for parents, siblings or children because you are duty-bound to do them. Pure affection and sincere emotions do not necessarily dictate everything we do for our blood relatives. Similarly a sense of duty and responsibility are an essential part of our love for a spouse, and the marriage contract spells that need for responsibility as much as blood does.I don’t have an issue with pre-marital sex. It’s legal and as long as the couple is of age and it’s consensual, it’s really silly to obsess about others having it. What is upsetting, however, is the perception of a woman as a “victim” if the relationship doesn’t culminate into marriage. People say the girl was “used”, or perhaps that she was “tricked” into having sex, that it now will affect her “reputation” and in general, the girl comes out as a sobbing sad story. I strongly disagree. Women today are in every workplace. They are educated, smart and responsible. If not, that’s not the guy’s fault.

He anyway wasn’t in love with her for her qualifications. People fall in love and hearts and bodies connect. That’s called being human. The girl enjoys sex as much as the guy does and when a couple splits up, to assume the guy isn’t equally hurt is absurd. But you don’t hear men wailing about being “dumped” or “used”, because men have been brought up to not display tears or signs of weakness. They are automatically and unfairly slotted as “tough” and hence, by default, as the emotionless users. How ridiculous to assume that women fall prey to a man’s charms, but that men don’t fall prey to a woman’s charm?! Talks of “character” and “reputation” are all societal prejudices and drive women to absolve themselves of all responsibility in the eventuality that things don’t go as planned.If only the two main players in this mess (Chaudhury and Tejpal) had shown some sensitivity towards the victim (that’s the very least under the circumstances), and done the right thing by seeking legal opinion to help the young woman, perhaps the widespread criticism that has hit them would have been less strident. There is nothing heroic about a sexual assaulter admitting his crime, especially since he was probably aware of the CCTV camera footage that could eventually nail him. For his buddies to laud him for being ‘gutsy’ and ‘honest’ by owning up, shows a pathetically skewered way of thinking. It is the victim who showed guts by speaking up. Well after all hell had broken loose, and social media platforms had created a war zone out of the controversy, nothing of any worth was forthcoming from Tehelka’s side. And this is where arrogance and short sightedness kicked in. Asking a media person if he was ‘an aggrieved party’ compounded the original sin and only succeeded in alienating/angering the press further. At this point, what Tejpal and Chaudhury needed was the support of media colleagues and well wishers. But after this boo-boo, nobody of consequence was willing to stick his/her neck out and defend what was increasingly looking indefensible. Even those early sympathizers who were shocked that “one of us” had done something this horrible!

Now that the Pandora’s Box has been pried open, it will be very difficult to put a lid on the scandal. By challenging public opinion, Chaudhury may have hammered the last nail into Tehelka’s coffin. The answer to her rather rude question, “Are you the aggrieved party?” thrown at a journo, is a resounding ‘Yes’. Every woman in India can claim to be the aggrieved party under these awful circumstances. Regardless of whether the young victim pursues the case, it is really out of her hands now. Public opinion is far more lethal than any amount of self-inflicted laceration and atonement. Admirers of the Tehelka brand of journalism have long believed that this powerful brand stood for the truth. Stood for justice. Penning weak apologies in overheated prose is a poor substitute for both — justice and the truth.

A young woman’s dignity is worth much more than the token ‘atonement’ on offer. Who should know that better than the two firebrand crusaders and activists who had taken it upon themselves to teach India how to THINK

If there’s any stigma to the woman, it’s not the man, but society to blame for it because if society is so concerned about the reputation of the womsan, it only needs to reprimand itself for creating such stupid stigmas in the first place.

“I think a sanctified marriage is when you have an option to sleep with 10 people, but you are still choosing that one person to live with,” said Irrfan. People wondered if he was hinting at being in an open marriage. Or was he a swinger? While an open marriage or a polyamorous arrangement implies a relationship with more than two people at the same time, a swinger swings from person to person, merely for sex.    I would like to think that Irrfan was doing more than confessing a sexual deviancy; he was talking of options and the power of choice – of marriage and fidelity as a choice, rather than a societal compulsion. Irrfan compounds the confusion further, “If you ask me, I would respect a marriage where the man and woman have the freedom to sleep with anyone. There is no bondage.”

  Making love over need not know any boundaries or norms; love can never be inappropriate unless it hurts another or dishonours your commitment to someone What are the emotions you would like to arouse in others, and what is it that you couldn’t stand anyone to feel for you? The best bit about being a woman is wielding the power to create and nurture while enjoying the thought of being a beautiful creation herself

Too sacred for them to be hold, To pure for them to understand.
Tonight I tell that tale to you,An open book for you to read,Your book, I yearn to read it too,And share each breath, your every need.

Gone the lonesome years, weeks, days,For now our hearts have taken flight,
You look at me with longing gaze,And I, at you with shy delight.
Love me; love all that I am,Cherish me as precious treasure,
Teach me with gentle guiding handEndlessly seeking His pleasure.

I may never see you,listen, talk, or love you.Maybe someday you will look up,and find the sky like an empty cup*.

—Of course, Irrfan stresses too much on the “sleeping with” bit. A marriage is not about just sex. If you look at sex as just a momentary act, a release for stress and a means to feel good about yourself, it may sound fine to have it anywhere, any time, with anyone. But look at it as a woman does – a means of coming intimately closer to the one you love. That can certainly not be shared with 10 people. And look at it the way scientists do. The act of sex releases chemicals that bring a couple closer to each other. Scientists opine that two powerful hormones that are released after sex — oxytocin and vasopressin — are responsible for feelings of deep commitment and attachment between two people.

You and I are nothing more,than pieces on a chessboard;Parts of a puzzle design,made by the same Divine.

And so, if in your experiments, you are attracted by and get attached to one of the outsiders, there is bound to be a lessening of attachment to the significant one, essentially rendering the open marriage into a broken marriage. Rightly do some therapists call an open marriage a recipe for disaster, jealousy, hurt and disappointment.

Forget 10, even one affair outside marriage carries with it the risk of breaking it up. With 10, the logistics would become impossible to handle. Proponents of an open relationship talk about the liberating effect of discussing other liaisons with their spouses, but they also agree that juggling lovers and trying to keep jealousy at bay can raise stress levels dangerously, often resulting in explosive situations; it is difficult for us to accept a love that is not exclusive.

Talk, shout, or whisper, let me know,break the barrier and let it flow.Ask me your questions, tell me your secrets,

Supporters of polyamorous relationships claim they are far more honest than those plodding along in boring monogamous ones. But to me, a swinger is more honest to himself and to those he/she has relationships with. Having a series of lovers and intimacies one after another without promise of commitment is better than having them all simultaneously. And marriage should come only when one is ready to commit to that one relationship. Accidents may happen along the way, but a planned infidelity runs contrary to normal human emotions and would spell chaos in society.

 Trust my heart and we will talk until the sun sets.Trust my heart and we will talk until the sun sets.

I do not agree that one gets married only because of societal compulsions, but yes, these may help keep many a marriage together. One of the essential stages of loving is to become so attached that you wish to not just share moments, but an entire lifetime with your loved one. You want to make a home and babies and share the pleasures of life with each other, be responsible for each other’s happiness and live in the security and knowledge that you are bound to each other by more than just that frivolous thing called romantic love. And this security comes from marriage. Love may ebb and flow, but marriage keeps you from walking off at the first visible hurdle. Kids hold you back even after several hurdles.

Trust my heart and we will talk until the sun sets.Hold my hand and let us embrace, no matter

what it is we’ll face,no one ever said it would be so easy or hard,Now come with me and let us go back to the start.

The thrill is not just in being a woman, but being a woman in the right century! And in this day and age, there cannot be many women, who do not revel in their sheer femininity and absolute power! As we all know, femininity and power, far from being mutually exclusive, are two sides of the same coin. Think Shakti, the divine, feminine, creative power! The Power responsible not just for all creation, but the agent of all change as well. I cannot believe any woman not feeling this great sense of empowerment and well-being that springs from within. The power to create, nurture and heal that is a part of her very being, endows her with unique abilities, positioning her as the centre of all existence and change around her.

Subscribers of open marriages say monogamy is like living a lie, but is there really space for a third in a marriage?

So call me conventional, old-fashioned, not with-it, or what you will. But when actor Irrfan Khan spoke in favour of open marriages (Times Life, October 6, 2013), I did not join the crowd of admirers applauding his ‘honesty’. Most of the applause anyway came from men; women were wary. What Irrfan had done was to lay bare an eternal male fantasy, and stoke a woman’s essential fear. He gave expression to what he called a “sanctified marriage” but what actually can at best be termed “sanctified infidelity”.

When Lord Byron wrote She walks in beauty, I’m sure he talked not just of the grace and deport of a woman, but was able to pierce through to her very core, which provides the majestic aura she walks within. To me, every woman who is allowed to grow unfettered, exercising her free will, is bound to walk in beauty! What is it that a woman enjoys the most about being the fairer sex? I would say her ability to revel in her power, as much as the freedom to indulge her weakness.

She is admired for being strong and loved for being frail and helpless; she can rave and rant when crazed with anger, and the next minute melt into a puddle of helpless love. She can enjoy her many moods and feminine aspects without having to abide by adages or the need to be strong all the time. A woman’s intuitive understanding of life and relationships, and her role as the great bonding factor in a family are unique strengths that she does not share with the opposite sex. The depths of passion in her eyes, the wealth of caring in her heart, the power of resilience, of survival are all qualities a woman enjoys, growing more beautiful and understanding with the years. As usual, my Facebook friends (I appealed to only women) had interesting insights to share. Each one of them loves being a woman and with one exception, they all want to be reborn female! Madhulika Dash applauds a woman’s “sense of compassion…… and the ability to infuse life into whatever we touch…”; Anjali Bhargava says, “The sheer strength a woman has… epitomises the completeness in a being.

I revel in the sensuous, intoxicating power of being a woman!” Deepika Sahu wouldn’t trade her world as a woman for anything else — a world “so very full of colours, variety, ability/desire to give without calculating, love, sensuality, tenderness, sensitivity… and of course gorgeous men who make me feel like a queen!” Pramila Maheshwari quips, “Shiva or Sati? Always the fairer one is the choice — she is happening, life, creation, nurturing — all activity is at her end.” Madhu Kamath says, “We are an unprecedented intricate, beautiful and unique piece of creation!!” Harmesh Khanna loves the “fact that we don’t have to hide our feelings or keep a stiff upper lip at all times…our ability to keep going in the toughest of times …of being ourselves, of getting pampered.”

If you need to hear what the stars say, Katrina Kaif loves the fact that she can be “soft and feminine and yet a successful working woman”, Sonam Kapoor loves being a woman because of “the ability to create life.” Marilyn Monroe said, “I don’t mind living in a man’s world as long as I can be a woman in it.” A naughty friend says, “Chuck all that, I love the fact that I can get the strongest man down to his knees in a puddle of desire if I set my mind to it. Why would I want to be that man!” Why indeed! And to support her, here we have it from the Father of all politicians — wily statesman Chanakya, “The world’s biggest power is the youth and beauty of a woman!” Need we say more?

Most television soaps keep the romantic lead stuck for long periods in love’s obsessive state. The camera caresses them from every angle as they stay frozen, giving each other prolonged lovelorn looks. Audience hearts stop likewise…freefalling with a collective thud as the screen couple’s loaded gazes break contact!This is repeated with nauseating frequency, television producers fighting shy of having the couple declare their feelings, as this would result in an assured dip in TRPs. The audience waits for the climactic declaration, and then loses interest! Who is interested in happily-ever-after? The excitement and adrenaline-laden moments all happen before the couple settles down to eternal, stable, boring bliss. And TV believes in doling out the just-before moments by the ladles to a romance-starved audience.

Wouldn’t it be nice if in real life too one could stay stuck forever in love’s obsessive state — where every footfall announces a lover’s visit, each whisper shivers down the spine, and any sound seems sweet as a nightingale’s song! A state of constant edge-of-seat excitement and suspense, not knowing what further delights the next moment will unfold!This of course is the second stage of falling in love, as enumerated by love researcher Helen Fisher of Rutgers University in New Jersey. The first stage is the phase of attraction, when you first find yourself drawn by and interested in another. In men this is typified by lust, a sexual attraction often fueled by visual interest; in women, it is often the result of a man’s interest in them, or his intellect, power or status. This stage quickly gives way to the obsessive second stage when hormones rage uncontrollably, keeping one on a perpetual high, with senses as though ‘of hemlock… drunk’. Every thought is of the beloved, each waking moment a bated breath, and sleep just an excuse to dream some more!

Science has established the actual chemical changes that take place in the obsessive state of love. The release of Dopamine gives one the same high as being on cocaine or nicotine. Adrenaline that courses through the veins increases heartbeats and is responsible for the restless excitement.  Levels of seratonin take a dip, which is what makes the initial stages of love akin to the symptoms of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder  – sleeping less, eating less, obsessively thinking of the lover and a constant living in wait of the next meeting!

With such excitement-inducing chemicals, is it surprising that one would like to stay in this state forever?  Maybe one should end affairs the moment they start, because the fun is actually already over by the time real romance begins; it is teetering on the edge of the precipice that gives one the highs, much more than the free fall into an abyss!  And as a colleague said wistfully, if this phase just has to end, wouldn’t it be nice to quit a relationship at the stage when romance quits, and fall all over in love again with someone else?! “That would be a nice way to hoodwink the natural progression of things and remain on a romantic high forever,” he grinned cockily.

But life is about moving on, not staying perched in one place. And so, in real life, as well as on the small screen, finally comes the day when romance is declared. By now the chemically-laden activity has settled down and you are able to focus on rest of life as well, apart from each other.And now comes the critical third stage of love. Some couples discover that there is nothing left once the chemistry is gone; others find a confident, stable love takes over from an uncertain, excited and nervous romance. Hormones settle down and one reaches the next stage of love; Oxytocin, the chemical for warm bonding, takes over. This chemical is released during orgasm and also during childbirth and helps create bonds between a couple, who now transcend from obsession into a deeper and mature partnership.  It is because of this quality of Oxytocin that physical contact, if indulged in a bit too soon in a relationship, can be misleading!

All three stages of love have their own unique characteristics and each prepares us for the next, logically falling in line with Nature’s natural plan of progression and procreation. Of course for those who would rather stay with the thrills and peaks rather than follow a steadier horizontal graph, my colleague’s suggestion of staying forever in the second stage of loving by jumping from one love to another, may be worth a try!

After all, the only thing you stand to lose is your sanity and credibility!
I didn’t mean to misplace my spirituality. I just lost it while searching for my identity. After a tumultuous marriage and divorce, all I wanted to do was scrape the remnants of the relationship from my being. In Pashto, a girl’s reputation is like a mirror, a chip or crack makes it look ugly. Thinking that my divorce was a mar on my honor, I wanted to not be me: the 24-year old girl married and divorced while her friends had just graduated. I wanted to be someone else, someone without a chip on her mirror.However, in trying to erase my past, I no longer knew who I was. After my divorce, I found myself sitting in my parents’ family room not laughing at jokes I once found funny. I no longer felt a bond with my friends. The talk of the latest clothes meant nothing. I realized the world had somehow passed me by. I was stuck in a place no one else existed.

There are two kinds of romantic love — one that makes homes, another that breaks them! The first is the result of the natural nesting instinct of all living beings. You grow up and find your feet; then you look for someone to share your life with. The natural urge for procreation sharpens senses, and the hunting instinct takes over as one looks for the right mate to have children and share our future with. You have waited for the right time and taken an informed decision to enter the next phase of life. Appropriate love.

Then there is love that breaks moulds and upsets settled patterns. Love that doesn’t follow societal norms and is considered inappropriate — for instance, extramarital love. A happily married person is as vulnerable to indulge in an affair on the side as one who is unhappy and needs a distraction. A wellsettled, happy life that doesn’t offer too many challenges leaves the mind free to be seduced by unexplored vistas. When the mind doesn’t challenge itself, nor are you engaged in something that stretches your mental boundaries, romance is an attractive option to fill the gaps.

On the other hand, someone who is unhappy with his or her personal life and relationships is also ripe prey for an attentive and sympathetic soul. Stuck in an unhappy relationship, he or she is happy to have a distraction that helps soothe the jagged edges of a stressful marriage and brings in moments of muchneeded happiness and peace. Inappropriate love!
What would you do if in your vulnerable moment you fell in love with a married man or woman? Or, if years later, you realized the man or woman you are married to is inappropriate for you?

“If someone had warned me about him 12 years ago, I would never have married Ranjan,”confessed Radha in one of those girly heart-to-hearts. “He is just so unsuitable for me!”

I am sure if someone were to ask Ranjan, he may have the same sentiment to express about his wife of 12 years.

Twelve years is a rather long time for a couple not to realise their ‘inappropriateness’ for each other. But I wonder how Radha would have responded if someone had pointed out their unsuitability while they were still in the first flush of love. Undoubtedly she wouldn’t have taken it positively. Did love iron over the ‘inappropriateness’ initially and then as it evaporated, allowed cracks in the relationship to show up?     What would you do if you found yourself in love with an ‘inappropriate’ person? Who is ‘inappropriate’ or rather, who decides who is appropriate? In Kuch To Log Kahenge, a popular serial on Sony TV, surgeon Dr Ashutosh and his junior by 22 years, Dr Nidhi are in love. Society frowns upon the age difference and they promise to try and forget each other. Is then a yawning age gap inappropriate? In another serial, Kya Hua Tera Wada, a female boss sets out to win back her former lover, now her junior and a married man. Is a boss-subordinate relationship inappropriate? Tom Cruise is 5’7” tall while former wife Nicole Kidman was 5’10”, and always chose to wear heels, a point of discord between them. Is a taller female partner inappropriate?

Smruthi, 28, a professor in Kannada was killed by her brother last month for marrying a Dalit. Is then, loving someone beyond your caste inappropriate? How about a very rich girl marrying a very poor guy, or an educated person falling for an unlettered one? Is that inappropriate?

How irreconcilable all the above differences are depends solely on the comfort level of the partners. However, when it comes to matters that involve the well-being of others, the decision of the appropriateness of a relationship goes beyond the concerned couple. For instance an extramarital affair, which puts at stake the happiness of others and breaks faith. Or someone in a disciplinary, authoritarian position involved with an underage ward. Or say, an incestuous relationship. To my mind these are the three possibilities where love can be inconvenient and inappropriate…

Can you add any others?

I was changed because of my life experiences. Even my mother seemed so young in her thoughts. Her own fairytale of a marriage set a precedent my dysfunctional marriage had never lived up to.

Tired of trying to fit in, I stopped being someone else and just started being. I began to wander like the Persian philosopher Ghazali. He left the contentment of his home in search of himself. Of course, I could never be so noble. Spending years in solitude with only God was what fortified my soul throughout my unhappy marriage. I went back to spending time in isolation, and I found it comforting.

Being alone gave me time to reflect and grow internally. I realized I had been tested in ways many were not. This was difficult to accept, but with prayer, I found myself understanding that I was different. This difference made me unique — a quality I started to like.

Eventually, I met my husband. My husband quenched a thirst I didn’t know I had. He looked past my broken exterior and saw a soul he called beautiful. For him, and for his love, I am thankful.

I thought I was done crying. I took for granted that I passed my “Test” and wouldn’t be tested again. What a fool I was.

Last year, I was given the gift of motherhood only to have it taken away too soon. Before Ibrahim died, I was oblivious to how seriously ill he was. I ignored the blinking red lights on his monitors and the daily commotion surrounding his little bed in the ICN. My family reassured me often that God loved me and that my son would be fine. I even convinced my husband that we would be taking him home before long.

One evening, I fell asleep in my hospital room and dreamt of holding hundreds of balloons, so colorful — a gift from my husband. They slowly turned white and began to slip away from my fingers. It was my husband who touched my arm and held me close when I panicked. “Let them go, honey, don’t you see how beautiful they make the sky?”

I woke up alarmed. I couldn’t speak or breathe from sorrow. I prepared for my baby’s departure that day. Because of the mercy of my dream, I gave my son a dignified goodbye, with my husband by my side.

Losing Ibrahim shattered me. He was the baby I played mommy to when I was a little girl. He was supposed to be the happy ending to my sad story. But God was not the cosmic Santa Claus I thought he was. I wouldn’t be punished or rewarded on earth for things I did. Mortality was a fact and people I loved would die. They didn’t belong to me or anyone else.

Just as I had given up, leaving my fate in God’s hands, I became pregnant soon after Ibrahim’s death. The new baby was due exactly on the first anniversary of Ibrahim’s passing. The following year, my second child, Musa, came into my barren lap filling it with love and drying my tears.

Without the many tests and trials of my life I would never know or appreciate the strength, the compassion, the love, the mortality, the mercy, and the miracles of God. I am humbled by the life God has woven for me and have no idea what to expect and no longer even try to guess.

The way Joseph’s scent made its way back to Jacob, I came back. I finally found God waiting where I had left Him and it wasn’t by changing who I was, but by embracing where I had been.

A plumpish overgrown girl, around 10 years old, fell in the middle of the mall with a resounding thump. She lay motionless for a stunned halfminute, and then was helped up by her concerned parents. She looked around with a sheepish grin, and finding many looking at her with amusement, burst into loud weeping.

She may have lapped up sympathy, but couldn’t stand the amusement at her expense. Understandable. We all live in fear of the world laughing at us. The Germans have a word for it — schadenfreude, the pleasure one derives from the misfortune of others! There are many feelings and emotions we may wish to arouse in others, but amusement at our expense is certainly not one of these. The Buddhist concept of mudita is the opposite of schadenfreude — happiness in the good fortune of others. So what did the girl do? She tried to change the amusement to sympathy by indicating that she had been hurt. I wonder if that made a difference to any of those having fun at her expense! But certainly her parents looked even more worried, and maybe that was good enough for her at that age.

I found it interesting to think of how even as kids, we try to manipulate the way the world looks at us, such is the significance we attach to it. Most of our activities, decisions, conversations, dreams — in fact, all our lives — are dictated by our need for others to look at us in a certain way. And born manipulators that humans are, we set around not just manipulating the world to look at us in a certain manner, but also manipulating our own selves to suit what we want the world to feel for us.

It is interesting to study the emotions we wish to arouse in others and those that we would never want others to feel for us! We all wish to be liked and loved; some wish for a staid, passive kind of loving, others for deep undercurrents and passion! But obsessive love is best avoided. Apart from this, we would rather attract empathy, not sympathy, and never pity. Empathy is when someone is able to relate on an equal footing,while sympathy normally implies an emotion by someone better off, and pity is worst of the lot, indicating superciliousness. Envy is a desirable emotion so long as others feel it for us, but jealousy makes us uncomfortable. For there is a destructive edge in jealousy that we wouldn’t like directed at us, while envy implies we have something better than others, which they covet.

We wish people to be indulgent towards our mistakes, not unforgiving and angry. We want them to laugh with us, but not at us. We may still be able to tolerate amusement, but never derision. That humiliates us, and even more so when witnessed by others.

What are the emotions we actively seek to arouse in people? “Liking and love,” said a female friend instantly, not stopping a minute to think. Another said, “Love and envy is fine but I certainly don’t want hatred, jealousy, or vengeance!” She went on to add, “This may sound dumb, but it’s very important to me to come across as a likable person; I even want the maid to know I am nice and it’s important to me that she likes me!” A female colleague answered, “The emotions I wish to arouse would have to be confidence (trust), and calmness. What I would never want to arouse would be… disgust, I suppose!”

A male friend’s instant reply was, “Passion, respect and fear is what I would wish to arouse in people.” Fear? “Yes, basically fear. All else springs from there. Genghis Khan, the great Mongol said that!” Another friend adds, “I wish to arouse awe in people, but never fear!” Yet another man says, “Obviously jealousy, love and anger! I’ve never bothered about the noble emotions, am comfortable looking at life like Duryodhana. Maybe not awful, but awesome… and it is fear or awe that makes you awesome.”

To each his own, but what is true is that getting to know how someone wants the world to look at him or her reveals the essence of an individual. Ask friends and think about it — what is the one emotion you would like to arouse in others, and the one emotion you couldn’t stand others to feel about you?

The mid-life crisis is no longer bad news for women. It’s an opportunity for new opportunities

Are you a woman in your 40s struck by strange restlessness, angst, and a feeling of something missing? Wonderful! You have hit the mid-life crisis, which today is nothing short of an opportunity to reinvent your life and live the way you wish to.
Kids flew the nest? Marital problems? Bored with your job? Lonely? Or, just irritated with the sameness of everything? You could be facing questions in your personal or professional life, or accosted by existential queries — do not just go with the flow. Get a grip on life and lead it where you want it.

I recently attended a Life Alignment group healing session with healer Jeff Levin in Delhi. Whether or not I managed to align my life through his revolutionary healing system is a moot point, but the day did turn into an interesting session that included therapy, some confessions, non-religious chanting and vibrational healing.

This group had almost all women in their middle years. The themes that emerged were: being taken for granted, forced to conform to social conditioning, arrested dreams, and unfulfilled aspirations. As Jeff encouraged each woman to speak, what reveal;ed itself was a group of women, who have purportedly lived a wonderful existence, undisturbed by major upheavals. They all considered themselves a happy, blessed lot with caring families — and yet there was a feeling of something vital missing.

Most of them had led protected lives, conforming to societal expectations. As one woman put it revealingly, “I went to college, got married, had children….and my husband has never restricted me. Yet, I always wanted to be an architect, and now I think it is too late.”

This panicky feeling of having done one’s duty to others, but not enough for oneself is a repeated motif in the lives of women of a certain age in India. As the years move on inexorably, women start feeling deprived. They have lived as daughters, wives, mothers and friends, but not really as themselves. What is it that you really want for yourself? What is the true purpose of Your life?

A tough question for women, especially Indian women, who grew up before the media explosion that brought in Hannah Montana and Lady Gaga into our living rooms. Few of us were lucky to have enlightened parents, who taught us to think for ourselves. For the rest, submission was the norm; rebellion, very rare.

Thankfully, today when mid-life crisis strikes, there are still a good many quality years left. Good education and independent incomes have ensured that women at this stage can still bring in powerful changes that give a new wonderful twist to their lives.

As natural creators and lifelong multi-taskers, women are far better equipped than men at reinventing their lives. But deep emotional attachments make it tougher for them to move on. Reaching for what you want involves a trade-off and so we tend to stick to our comfort zones.

However, so long as you are clear what you want, it is never too late to salvage a dream — so what if we can live out just certain aspects of it? And so, if not an architect, what stops you from creating beautiful spaces around yourself ? If you wished to be a doctor and couldn’t, what stops you from healing now?

After all, what’s in a name?

In the theatrical convention of Mahathir’s  politics, the former prime ministerhas scripted to straddle the national stage. He’s the sceptered protagonist, soliloquising on national perils and remedial programmes. Everyone else – partymen or ministers – must play the chorus. They must have one refrain: Yes,Tun Mahathir. behind-the-scenes way of functioning, his detractors lament, denotes ‘leadership deficit’. It’s a charge he recently sought to counter in Parliament, cautioning the DAP against “arrogance”. Mild as it was, this combativeness was unusual. Normally nAJIBh has a signature low-key style, approaching the rare quality of self-effacement in a power-wielder. His political DNA is such he likes to remain in the wings. Or he hovers like a silent, levitating presence over the stage, giving the key lines to other UPA actors.

Right now, UMNO really needs some scapegoats, big, healthy ones. We list a few suggestions for the high command’s consideration.Sins call for atonement, crimes must be punished. And what better, if such redemption can be detached from those really culpable and outsourced to some dumb creature that cannot complain? This was the idea behind the Biblical practice of casting a goat into the wilderness after ascribing all manner of ills and improvidence to it. Many virtues extolled by religion have waned over time; scapegoats have thrived. Najib should all be detached from power

And so Najib is coming into his own, rising and making himself heard. And having risen and developed a voice, he wishes to see change around him fast. That is what is responsible for the  phenomena. People are tired of seeing the same old parties carrying on the same old charade in their own individual ways. So you vote for change – but then you wish to see change fast! The expectations riding that change are huge. And so, the backlash in case of failure is tremendous.Najib led the government but could not contain persistent inflation or reverse a crippling slowdown. That there would be corruption in the government is perfectly understandable (how else are parties supposed to mobilise the fortunes they need to function?), but did he even make an attempt to speak up in defence of the government when accused of assorted scams? Now, telecom is a scam in public perception, instead of the genuine revolution – which has spread to the remotest corners of the land, empowered people and raised productivity and economic growth – that deserves to be celebrated. 

 Dear Tun, wasn’t this what Pak Lah initiated after taking over from you? If you had let him do his job in the first place, the rakyat will not be in this state of affairs.

Pak Lah wanted to save some money and re-evaluate all the so-called mega-projects. He wanted to take the country to a stronger financial footing before re-embarking on some economically driving projects at a later stage, but no one allowed him to do his job

Three months ago when Pak Lah (former PM Abdullah Badawi) launched his latest book ‘Awakening’, Mahathir was unhappy with some of its content where Pak Lah criticised him and stopped a number of his costly projects, such as the crooked bridge and the dual-track railway.

In the book, Pak Lah mentioned that the government will go bankrupt if these projects were allowed to go on. Mahathirresponded sarcastically that he should not have built KLIA (Kuala Lumpur International Airport), the North-South Highway, etc.
Mahathir had been very unhappy with Pak Lah for trying to save money for the government and he seemed to be happy with PM Najib Razak’s spendthrift way.

Now he is doing an about-turn by asking Najib to cut cost after Najib incurred an additional RM300 billion deficit during his last five years as PM and finance minister. Mahathir must have realised that even many Umno ministers and pro-Umno NGOs are unhappy with the sudden multiple price increases.

 Mahathir policy vibrant enough to withstand both coercion and bribery to corruption, inflation, black eyes

Mahathir’s cronies has a company to do that for the government at a “reasonable” cost. At just 10 sen profit per bulb, can you imagine how many bulbs there are in Putrajaya alone?And why pay over the top to re-badge old model Honda Accord as Proton Perdana?Are we so shameless? But why pay more?And what happened to keeping Government building air-conditioners at 23 or 24 degrees celsius?Why civil servants still wear jackets in the office?is it to keep IPP in business?

Former prime minister Tun Dr Mahathir Mohamad (pic) today aligned himself with Malaysians who  believe that the Najib administration should cut costs instead of raising prices of goods and services.This is what market competition is all about. This is Economics 101 which most of our leaders, including those claiming to be finance wizards, are incapable of comprehending.How do businessmen reduce cost when they are operating in an economy saddled with distortions and colossal rent-seeking practices?How do they reduce energy cost when lopsided IPP (independent power producer) agreements were never rectified and corrected? How do they reduce transportation cost when all the highways are operated by cronies, all of which are also monopolies?

How do they reduce the prices of essential goods such as rice, sugar, flour and cars when subsidies on them were reduced but the monopolies in importation and distribution are still in the hands of the selected few?

How do they reduce transactions cost when businessmen have to grease the politicians at every nook and corner?

How to reduce inflation when so many people are getting fat pays for doing almost nothing (in fact, their contributions to the economy is negative), while those working their butts out are getting pittance?

How to increase efficiency when most of the workers are so poorly trained and motivated?

One thing I do agree – the government could cut its cost (expenditure) by at least 20 percent without jeopardising its output, i.e. without affecting the services it provides to the people.

There is too much fat in the government, either in the form of overpricing or over-purchasing, a topic which I have highlighted in numerous occasions.

Weighing in on the current debate over rising prices, Dr Mahathir said Putrajaya could minimise wastage and improve efficiency by applying a “cost down” concept to manage its growing expenses.

“The Government often wastes money because it is not too concerned about the returns on its expenditure in whatever form… If the Government is interested in reducing the cost of governance, it can do so and perhaps quite substantially.”

For example, the Government could save substantially, more than 50%,  if it opted for light-emitting diode bulbs, he added.

“The subsequent reduction in the amount of electricity to be generated will reduce subsidy on fuel for power. But this has not been done by the Government.”

SHOCKING REVEALATIONS by Dr Ani: TNB/IPPs Contracts -ALL lopsided, Raw Deals. NO Negotiations at all. The fingers point back to Tun Dr M

‘Dumb and Dumber To’. Let me guess the main stars in this sequel comedy flick would be Tengku Adnan Tengku Mansor and Ahmad Zahid Hamidi. To Umno delegates – Riza’s company has risen from “nowhere” in 2010 to “top company to watch”. Your president’s stepson is an excellent example of rags to riches. Umno delegates’ children should emulate the president’s and his stepson’s footstep. Now, we know the real reason why the delegates preferred no contest for the president’s post. The delegates definitely have a good foresight of the president family’s noble contributions to the country.

Riza Shahriz Abdul Aziz, Rosmah’s son from an earlier marriage, reportedly bought the seven-room property at 63rd Street in Park Laurel, New York.

The Sarawak Report, citing a New York real estate site The Real Deal, claimed that Riza bought the property on November 19 last year.

How to attract investors in Malaysia when the stepson of Najib would invest hundreds of million in New York rather than homeland?Are Malaysians losing confidence in our homeland and where did Riza Shahriz Abdul Aziz got so much money? Is it part of the unaccountable billions channelled out?Is the United States government going to investigate this possible money-laundering activity of just ‘close an eye’ since the Najib and Rosmah are contributing to the US economy while bleeding their own country?No, I am neither prudish, nor unduly conservative, nor Victorian.  But I am indeed amused by the duplicity of a society that pretends to regard even personal attitude towards the son bankrolled Hollywood movies, but I wonder who bankrolled the son.  as taboo,  Questions, questions, questions: Is Najib going to say he is my stepson, what he did is none of my business? Is Rosmah going to say he is the son of my first marriage, he is a fully grow-up man, what he did is none of my or Najib’s business?Is the Umno Supreme council going to say this has nothing to do with Najib or Umno? Is Malaysian Anti-Corruption Commission (MACC) going to say Riza is not in government and therefore out of its jurisdiction?Is the cabinet going to say that this is the Najib’s family and private matter, it has nothing to do with his position as the PM of Malaysia? Are all the nincompoop BN MPs going to say that there is no evidence to prove or insinuate anything?

Riza Shahriz Abdul Aziz  who held a minor position in HSBC, he has managed to accumulate a tidy pile of cash. Wonder what the source of the family money is? Miracles do happen when my ‘Daddy-O’, though a stepdad, is a prime minister of Umno-Malaysia – a land of opportunity, crooned Riza Shahriz Abdul Aziz.

He graduated in 2000, worked as consultant in KPMG for two years and another six in a bank, HSBC. From 2008 to2013, five years later, having no tangible business at all, he suddenly can afford to buy an RM110 million condominium unit in New York?

Coincidentally Najib, the step ‘Daddy-O’ became a PM in 2009. Obviously, he is very much loaded as nobody uses their entire fund to buy a roof under their head – a billion or two?

We would like to ask the many poor Malays who voted for BN in the last GE, how come the children of Umno leaders are so ‘smart in making money’ for themselves? Are their children as smart as them in making money? If not, then why not?

If one Umno Malay child can make millions, or billions, in a matter of less than five years, then why can’t an ordinary Malay child do the same?

The answer is, my friend, no two Malays is the same; one is Umno-Malay elite and the other is the ordinary one. Like the mantra of the property buyers; instead of ‘location, location, location’, in this case it is ‘connection, connection, connection.’

It’s quite apt that the movie he bankrolled is titled ‘The Wolf of Wall Street’, a parable about greed, lust and other bad behaviour. Well, this may not be news in the ‘Breaking News’ category, but we are told, there a award associated with first lady family Innumerable social media networks had registered their disgust about Innumerable social media networks had registered their disgust about ‘It’s quite apt that the movie he bankrolled is titled ‘The Wolf of Wall Street’, a parable about greed, lust and other bad behaviour.’ It looks like PM Najib Razak’s children, relatives and cronies like Jho Low should be able to give the relatives, children and cronies of other BN leaders such Dr Mahathir Mohamad, Abdullah Ahmad Badawi, Abdul Taib Mahmud, Shahrizat Abdul Jalil, Ling Liong Sik, S Samy Vellu, etc. a run for their money.About 53 percent of Malaysians have a good idea as to from where and how all these BN leaders and their families and cronies stole the millions and billions. Unfortunately 47 percent of Malaysians that voted for BN have not realised how BN picks their pockets.

When Mahathir was PM, he claimed that his children were ‘smart’ and that was why they were successful and very rich.

Pak Lah’s son and son-in-law were also ‘smart’. Now we get to see PM Najib Razak’s and Rosmah Mansor’s children and stepsons getting to be as ‘smart’ as Mahathir’s children. There is no end to the greed of the Umno family.Why have we become defeatists just because by whistleblower portal Sarawak Report,, has done such a brilliant job of exposing this strangely gut-wrenching but simultaneously hilarious loot of our wealth citing a New York real estate website, Innumerable social media networks had registered their disgust about had bought the property in November last year, : “The revelation is shocking. At a time when the people are struggling with the cost of living, some are splurging.Prime Minister Najib Abdul Razak’s family’s lavish spending indicates that they are living beyond their means and warrants a probe by the Malaysian Anti-Corruption Commission (MACC) failure to convict high-ranking Barisan Nasional (BN) leaders who have made headlines for alleged corruption Why are we so depressed merely because the New media has turned Rosmal s image into a toilet seat readmorehttp://suarakeadilanmalaysia.wordpress.com/2013/11/24/najib-newly-minted-cabinet-should-be-arrested-for-being-complicit-to-defrauding-the-country/

dream first sketched in “An Area of Darkness” ? Away with the frozen frown! We must be sunny and optimistic. Let us look at the positive side and list the great achievements that await us When a thief picks your pocket you soon realise that you have lost your money to a thief once you put your hand in the pocket. But when the money is stolen from you in a more elaborate manner, as has been and is being done by the BN leaders, you only realise it if someone knowledgeable informs you how the scam is carried out. The average cost of producing an A-Grade film in Hollywood is US$150 million or some RM450 million. (‘Avatar’ is believed to have finally cost US$500 million or RM1·5 billion.)

Even if we assume that the subject and his partner have bankrolled only one film and the production cost has been split down the middle between them, we are still talking of RM225 million.

But let’s work on a very conservative estimate and suppose that the sole film bankrolled so far has cost him only RM150 million. Add that to the cost of the penthouse condo unit, and we have RM260 million.

He must have some money as reserves to bankroll the next what he and his partner consider a potential as well as to finance his and his family’s expenses. However, we shouldn’t even hazard a guess as to the amount, and consider only the RM260 million.

Where did he get or how has he got that kind of money, when he has worked for only some half a dozen years and we haven’t heard of him being a financial wizard?

For instance Mahathir and his YTL crony steal billions through the crooked IPP deal but many Malaysians are not aware that money is stolen from them every time they pay their electricity bill.

100 years from now, history students cannot differentiate Imelda Marcos from this fat lady.

Are you the reincarnation of Mao Tsetung, Rosmah? Wouldn’t be surprised if YOU are the Chinese tsunami your chubby hubby referred to.

Fat, short and ugly piece of shit. Any tom, dick and harry will surely go for the Mongolian instead of her. Even the Mongolian ass is much better looking.

Rosmah Mansor is feeling the loneliness of her “top level” position – she only has her husband and Prime Minister Najib Abdul Razak to complain to about allegations levelled at her in the social media. what real men want with the accompanying hems & haws?! Give me a break! Might as well I support the foaming in the mouth Cheeky fellow to regulate online portals like how Singapore did it. Come to think of it, perhaps Fat Mama’s complains to Jibby yielded some results i.e. REGULATING online portals starting with Mkini

What with the botox lady,… you are making your face look bigger than your hair. And I really like your kindergarden level of research. And “(However,) after five years, when the business is in trouble, they go to banks and ask for money”. Waahh so easy aah? I also want to ask the banks for money, can or not?Don’t poke your nose into Government affairs unless you are given a task to carry out . . . There’s going to be an International Conference on the Malaysia Agreement in Kota Kinabalu on Sept 13. Had the Malaysia Agreement been complied with, it would have been 50 years old this year. The Conference, sponsored by the Borneo Heritage Foundation, will be moderated by Tan Sri Simon Sipaun who has been preaching all his adult life that “life was better in Sabah before Malaysia”. He was even interrogated once on this after a police report was lodged against him. Tan Sri Simon was a former Sabah state secretary, vice chairman of the Malaysian Human Rights Commission and Advisor to the Malaysian Anti-Corruption Commission . . readmoreThe whizkid dealmaker Low Taek Jho (Jho Low),,too close to Rosmah Mansor

What young men want’

Rosmah’s Luxury Lifestyles Remembering  Rospussy juice

The dislocation produced by age becomes even stronger when rosmah look at those considerably older than ourselves. Were our grandparents ever really young? Of course, we have all seen their photographs, those sepia tinted assertions of their once-youth. But it seems as if the people in those photographs are other people, with an admittedly striking if faded resemblance to the real articles in front of us. Their youth seems to Rosmah like a land far, far away and stories about the times when they were young have a dreamy, fable like quality. One doesn’t quite locate those stories in the same terrain as one on which we lead our lives. Their youth seems like an aberration or at best, a vehicle for getting them to this point and making them what they are today. To use a common benchmark, who would argue with the claim that Najib and Rosmah were never young. Their youth is a manufactured back story, one that takes place quickly in the first ten minutes of a film, so that we can get on to the real story,.

THEY’RE FAMED AS MUCH FOR THEIR WORK AND TALENT AS THEY ARE FOR THEIR DARK TRAITS, THEN BE IT THEIRWOMANISING BEHAVIOUR OR FOR BEING MOODY, AGGRESIVE AND TEMPREMENTAL. YET THERE’S SOMETHING ABOUT SUCH ‘BAD BOYS’ THAT MAKES THEM INSANELY LIKEABLE TO THE OPPOSITE SEX. CHECK THIS OUT. BE IT SHANE WARNE OR SALMAN KHAN OR SANJAY DUTT OR COLIN FARRELL, THEY CONTINUE TO ENJOY AN EVER GROWING FEMALE FAN FOLLOWING.

On the fact that there are more female than male undergraduates in local universities, Rosmah opined that this is because young men have other priorities.

“They want to earn money fast, they want to do business, they don’t want to enter university,” she said.

“(However,) after five years, when the business is in trouble, they go to banks and ask for money. When (the loan application is rejected and they are) forced to close the business, it is (seen as) the government’s fault.

“I don’t know what’s happening to you men. You’d better to think of your species very seriously.”

She urged the men present at the event – mainly comprising senior government officers – to encourage young men to complete their tertiary studies

“I want to touch on ICT use. You have to take it seriously. You should know what to (accept) and what not (to accept). You need to use rational and objective information.

She said information spread on online and in the social media are “sometimes lies”.

In a new study, researchers have investigated what factors influence dishonest behaviour.

Previous research has shown that a person’s first instinct is to serve his or her own self-interestand that people are more likely to lie when they can justify such lies to themselves.

With these findings in mind, psychological scientists Shaul Shalvi of the University of Amsterdam and Ori Eldar and Yoella Bereby-Meyer of Ben-Gurion University colleagues hypothesized that, when under time pressure, having to make a decision that could yield financial reward would make people more likely to lie.

They also hypothesized that, when people are not under time pressure, they are unlikely to lie if there is no opportunity to rationalize their behaviour.

“According to our theory, people first act upon their self-serving instincts, and only with time do they consider what socially acceptablebehaviour is,” Shalvi said.

“When people act quickly, they may attempt to do all they can to secure a profit—including bending ethical rules and lying. Having more time to deliberate leads people to restrict the amount of lying and refrain from cheating,” Shalvi said.

For the study, the researchers first tested participants’ tendency to lie when doing so could be easily justified – approximately 70 adult participants rolled a die three times such that the result was hidden from the experimenter’s view.

The participants were told to report the first roll, and they earned more money for a higher reported roll.

Seeing the outcomes of the second and third rolls provided the participants with the opportunity to justify reporting the highest number that they rolled, even if it was not the first – after all, they had rolled that number, just not the first time they rolled the die.

Some of the participants were under time pressure, and were instructed to report their answer within 20 seconds. The others were not under time pressure, and had an unlimited amount of time to provide a response.

The experimenters were not able to see the actual die rolls of the participants, to ensure all rolls were private. Instead, in order to determine whether or not the participants had lied about the numbers they rolled, Shalvi and colleagues compared their responses to those that would be expected from fair rolls.

They found that both groups of participants lied, but those who were given less time to report their numbers were more likely to lie than those who weren’t under a time constraint.

The second experiment followed a similar procedure, except that the participants were not given information that could help them justify their lies – instead of rolling their die three times, they only rolled it once and then reported the outcome.

In this experiment, the researchers found that participants who were under time pressure lied, while those without a time constraint did not.

Together, the two experiments suggest that, in general, people are more likely to lie when time is short. When time isn’t a concern, people may only lie when they have justifications for doing so.

“One implication of the current findings is that to increase the likelihood of honest behaviour in business or personal settings, it is important not push a person into a corner but rather to give him or her time,” Shalvi said.

“People usually know it is wrong to lie, they just need time to do the right thing,” Shalvi added.

The study has been published in Psychological Science.

“If anyone wants to commit a sin, (he or she) can read and believe (those allegations). But, before you believe, please do some investigation,” she said.

The young fear age and seek to distance themselves from it in a variety of ways. Our grandparents were thus never young for if they were, one day i too will become like them. When the young speak of the old, it is as if they talk of another species, creatures from another land. The illusion of permanence that youth nurtures so actively is encouraged in all forms of popular culture, and is sought to be perpetuated in a variety of ways, including the pharmaceutical and surgical. We deny age for as long as we can and once it cannot be pushed away any more, we work hard at de-fanging it by emphasising its toothlessness. The societal expectation from the old is that they become naturally sacrificing and behave as large cuddly toys that make few demands.

For those that lie suspended between youth and old age, there is a double sense of distance. The younger version seems to be, somewhat ironically, a dated version of oneself, while the older version to come, is as yet difficult to imagine, although one can begin to feel age creaking in one’s knees. It is one thing to become older, but does it necessarily involve having to become someone else?

According to a research study, 50 to 60 per cent of married men engage in extramarital sex at one time or the other. Here’s to find out whether your man is cheating on you.

More often than not, women have no clue what the men in their life are doing. Though you need some basic knowledge to protect yourself from getting hurt; you must find out whether your man is cheating on you first. Here are some ways

He has cheated before

If your man has cheated on you before; you need to undoubtedly watch out for his past behaviour. Often people still do not rectify their faults and do the same thing time and again.

He is a narcissist

Men with narcissistic personality feel that they are entitled to more things than other people. These people have a tendency to cheat because they feel that they don’t have to play by the rules in a relationship.

He has no sense of guilt

Men who don’t feel guilty or remorse for what they’ve done or about their ways is more likely to cheat. Maybe such men don’t have emotions that hold them back.

He’s an excellent liar

If he’s good at lying about other things in life, watch out. Those who constantly come up with something about their life that isn’t true, chances are that they would cheat.

He’s picked up from home/family

Just like how a child picks up most habits from home/parents, similarly people have a tendency to pick up such habits from their near and dear ones. If someone is constantly exposed to unfaithful people at home or within their friend circle, chances are that they would pick up this trait.

We give you a small ready reckoner on how men behave in relationships…

Guys tend to get serious with their relationship and become too possessive.

It’s not easy for a guy to let go of his girlfriend after they broke up especially when they’ve been together for 3 years or more.

A guy has to experience rejection, because if he’s too-good-never-been-busted, never been in love and hurt, he won’t be matured and grow up.

When an unlikable circumstance comes, guys blame themselves a lot more than girls do.

Guys have strong passion to change.

Guys are tigers in their peer groups but become tamed pussycats with their girlfriends.

When a guy pretends to be calm, check if he’s sweating. You’ll see that he is nervous.

When a guy asks you to leave him alone, he’s just saying, “Please come and listen to me”

When a guy loves you, bring out the best in him.

If a guy starts to talk seriously, listen.

If a guy has been kept shut or silent, say something. (He generally has a lot of frustration in mind then)

Guys believe that there’s no such thing as love at first sight, but court girls anyway and then realize at the end that he is wrong.

Guys like femininity not feebleness.

A guy may instantly know if the girl likes him but can never be sure unless the girl tells him. (So girls you should think of making the first move)

A guy would waste his time over video games and basketball, the way a girl would do over her romance novels and make-ups.

Guys love girls who can cook.

Guys like girls who are like their moms. No kidding!

A guy’s friend knows everything about him.

The first order of business after a split is by getting involved in some casual sex, according to experts.

However, casual sex to some is fine only if the two have truly, emotionally, moved on, the Huffington Post reported.

It could be good idea, as it helps you to forget that you have been sleeping with a jerk before.

As long as it is protected there is problem at all. It’s part of the moving on process.

Meanwhile, some believe it’s hard for people to disconnect feelings and sex could result in mixed feelings.

As an advice it would be better if you don’t try to fill the void you’re missing with some meaningless sex.

A lot of healing would have to take place first before you start dating. If not, it’s a disaster.

Here’s a peep into those hidden secrets … dig into them at your own risk!

- I might just hate it when you sleep in that office shirt, but when you are away, I love to snuggle up in your shirt because it smells of you.

- Though I insist on paying the bill or sharing it in our initial dates, I’ll find you cheap and so non-chivalrous in case you don’t insist on making the payment.

- Long before we explored each other’s bodies, I had been fantasizing about being with you. That inhibition was only to get assured that you are all mine.

- I do think about my ex-es and compare them to you. Mostly you win, but you are not all perfect.

- ‘I don’t care you call or not’ is pure pretence. In fact, I start waiting for your next call the moment one ends. Not just this, I eagerly want you to plan our next date even before the current one ends. I might not show it. So, don’t fret about looking desperate just call! The gap looks like a lifetime to me.

- During the initial days of our relationship, I used to save all our chat histories and your SMSes and read them again and again. Sometimes, made my friends read them, too.

- The day you shared your password with me, digging into your chat records and mails was the first thing I did.

- I would love to know what turns you on. Though, I know it’s going to be hilarious as I’ve seen your frequently-visited porn sites.

- You don’t have to be a ‘good boy’ with me all the time. I don’t mind talking a little dirty.

- You are my soul mate, but my ‘best friend’ is my confidante. From the size of your pay cheque, bank account to the size of your other assets…she knows it all. So, till you are telling her how much you love me all’s fine. Remember she’s my best friend and never yours.

- You rightly blame me for bombarding you with so many questions. But, that’s my way of testing you. I judge and analyse you on every word, expression, action, e-mail or SMS you write to me or someone else. So, when I ask “Do you fantasize about other women?,” the answer has to be “Why would I when I am with you?” So, better watch out!

- I love to make you a little jealous as it makes me feel wanted. So the next time you spot me flirting with your friend, know that I’m actually flirting with you through her.

- Every time I fight with you is because I feel ignored. Don’t get into your cocoon when I’m bad. Just give me what I’m fighting for – a little attention and I’ll be all yours.

- I love to get constant reminders of the much known fact that – you need me. So, what’s the harm in dropping liners saying ‘You complete me’ or ‘Don’t ever leave me alone’ … ?

- Last but not the least, irrespective of how independent and self-driven I am, how ever much I may say that I don’t need a man to be happy, but still I want you to take charge when we are in bed.

Kuala Lumpur deputy police chief Amar Singh has denied accusing four NGOs involved in the anti-price hike protest of planning to conduct bombings during the demonstration on Dec 31.

Utusan Malaysia quoted Amar as saying that he was only talking about the risk of bombings that may be done by other participants.

“During the press conference, I mentioned four NGOs were identified as being part of the protest. The gathering is against the law as they do not have a permit.

“My statement about bomb threats and dangerous weapons was not directed at the NGOs involved but was based on a statement by an individual on Facebook before this,” he was quoted as saying.

This comes after two of the NGOs, namely Solidarti Anak Muda Malaysia (SAMM) and Jingga 13, had threatened to sue the senior cop.

The other NGOs named by Amar as being organisers of the protests were Gerakan Turun Kos Sara Hidup (Turun) and Solidariti Mahasiswa Malaysia (SMM).

During a press conference last Saturday, Amar had read out a prepared statement about the New Year’s eve anti-price hike protest.

“Irresponsible groups have propagated on websites and social media by telling people that they will topple the government through the rally.

“They also organised a series of illegal protests in a few locations and states by inciting the public, especially youths, to topple the government.

“It cannot be denied that these groups create a ruckus when they turn up with tents, bring tools or dangerous weapons such as hand grenades or gas masks and even breach cordons and clash with police and other actions that are against the law,” he had said.

Turun chief Azan Safar has denied planning to overthrow the government and instead accused the ruling coalition of trying to distract the public from spiralling living cost which the protest is highlighting.

A New York court Sept. 5 issued a summons for All India Congress Committee president Sonia Gandhi, who is being sued by the U.S.-based Sikhs for Justice for her alleged involvement in the 1984 anti-Sikh riots.

Gandhi is reportedly in the U.S., for treatment for an undisclosed medical condition. In August 2011, Gandhi was reportedly treated for ovarian cancer at Memorial Sloan Kettering Hospital in New York. India-West and other media reported that Gandhi was being treated by a team of doctors, led by radiation oncologist Dattatreyudu Nori.

Contacted on his cell phone by India-West this week, Nori would not respond to questions about whether he was currently treating Gandhi.

Gandhi has not yet been served with the summons, as process servers have been unable to locate her at various New York hospitals, according to Gurpatwant Pannun, attorney for the U.S.-based Sikhs for Justice. The summons most be served within 120 days.

Pannun told India-West that if the organization failed to serve the summons while Gandhi is in the U.S., it will invoke The Hague Convention procedures for serving summons abroad.

“The Congress Party organized the systematic killing of Sikhs in 1984. Sonia has been protecting and shielding killers and giving them important positions within the Congress party,” stated Pannun. “We want to expose Sonia Gandhi’s role in killing thousands and thousands of innocent Sikhs. There have been no investigations of these killings at all,” he stated.

The now powerful scion of the Congress party was not involved in politics when the riots occured in 1984 and did not engage in politics until two years after her husband Rajiv Gandhi’s murder in 1991

The riots were an act of politics. Politics is madness. Politics turns people into beasts. I saw my neighbour’s body on the street devoured by dogs after the mobs roasted him. So many relatives of the riot victims just died crying and lamenting for their loved ones.

I still don’t know who was responsible for the killings. Indian governments are not so bad, actually. Its foreign forces who hatch these plans. I vote both for the Congress and BJP.

There were 14 corpses in one house on our street. The women and children were stoned and asked to leave. The men were hunted down and killed. I saw my husband being set alight. I kept running to the killers, asking for forgiveness. They beat me back with sticks.

I was left with four children to bring up. I don’t feel angry any longer. I have been numbed by grief for as long as I can remember. All that is left are some memories and my little hous

Unbelievable. To me Amar Singh double-talked and was caught confusing over what was the real thing. Think for a moment, do Malaysians involved in the last several mass rallies found to be militant in nature? No. Think again, what benefits can be derived if these youths create trouble at the said rally? But who will stand to benefit from the actual price hikes in electricity bill, highway tolls, and sugar price? IPP operators will benefit from the first, concessionaires will benefit from the second, while monopolies for the third. The beneficiaries are the cronies of the regime. Rightly, they are fearful of the rally. Clearly, the police is not with the masses.Add some more ghee to your chapatti. Don’t twist your words.

The Sikhs used to be respected for their loyalty, tenacity and honesty and integrity. Even Standard Chartered Bank used them as a symbol of integrity and strengthe in their advertisements. But sadly, Sikhs like Amar Singh has brought a shame to this once-proud community… really shameful… the Kuala Lumpur deputy police chief Datuk Amar SinghIshar … to be haunted and hounded by such “imaginary enemies” just to prop up the …cybertroopers that he is planning to plant bombs in certain locations in … up the UMNO blogger and not be harassing Rafizi as in other countries where   Now, look who is spinning ? As your former IGP said ” Malaysian are a rational lots…………….except the Police perhaps ! People like you Mr. Singh, please think carefully before you read out the ill-prepared statement. The Police was commented for their fast action in tracking down the two kids who spread “Bak Kut Teh” joke on the facebook, but this time you guys seem to have lost the drive to nap those guys on the Facebook who threaten the country security with bombs! Hey, where is your priority !

Try picture this: Rakyat to topple the government, dangerous weapons, gas masks, hand grenades etcs..Is this a lawless land ?? Son, you missed out C4. Mr Singh, either you have a cup too much of vokhas or you’re watching too much of yankee movies. Grow up lah, do not twist and turn you tongue like your masters. No wonder people distrust PDRM so much.A New York court Sept. 5 issued a summons for All India Congress Committee president Sonia Gandhi, who is being sued by the U.S.-based Sikhs for Justice for her alleged involvement in the 1984 anti-Sikh riots.

Gandhi is reportedly in the U.S., for treatment for an undisclosed medical condition. In August 2011, Gandhi was reportedly treated for ovarian cancer at Memorial Sloan Kettering Hospital in New York. India-West and other media reported that Gandhi was being treated by a team of doctors, led by radiation oncologist Dattatreyudu Nori.

Contacted on his cell phone by India-West this week, Nori would not respond to questions about whether he was currently treating Gandhi.

Gandhi has not yet been served with the summons, as process servers have been unable to locate her at various New York hospitals, according to Gurpatwant Pannun, attorney for the U.S.-based Sikhs for Justice. The summons most be served within 120 days.

Pannun told India-West that if the organization failed to serve the summons while Gandhi is in the U.S., it will invoke The Hague Convention procedures for serving summons abroad.

“The Congress Party organized the systematic killing of Sikhs in 1984. Sonia has been protecting and shielding killers and giving them important positions within the Congress party,” stated Pannun. “We want to expose Sonia Gandhi’s role in killing thousands and thousands of innocent Sikhs. There have been no investigations of these killings at all,” he stated.

The now powerful scion of the Congress party was not involved in politics when the riots occured in 1984 and did not engage in politics until two years after her husband Rajiv Gandhi’s murder in 1991
 

Indira Gandhi, who orchestrated emergency rule in India and Punjab ordered the storming and attack on Amritsar in June 1984. Months later she was assassinated. This video contains BBC News coverage of the time.

The Sikhs used to be respected for their loyalty, tenacity and honesty and integrity. Even Standard Chartered Bank used them as a symbol of integrity and strengthe in their advertisements. But sadly, Sikhs like Amar Singh has brought a shame to this once-proud community… really shameful…

Try picture this: Rakyat to topple the government, dangerous weapons, gas masks, hand grenades etcs..Is this a lawless land ?? Son, you missed out C4. Mr Singh, either you have a cup too much of vokhas or you’re watching too much of yankee movies. Grow up lah, do not twist and turn you tongue like your masters. No wonder people distrust PDRM so much.

While watching another inane debate on a news channel last night, I was appalled by the attempt made by the anchor and the BJP spokesperson to compare the anti-Muslim Gujarat pogrom of 2002 with the anti-Sikh 1984 one. Of course, there are similarities –  one particular community was targeted; the government didn’t do enough to stop the carnage; and thousands died. However, that’s where the comparison ends. In the years that followed, the Congress apologized and took corrective steps; the BJP didn’t.

The Congress made amends (this post points out how); as a result, the Sikhs have forgiven the Congress. But the BJP has made no amends at all. In fact, it has gone the opposite way and made Godhra and Hindutva the centerpiece of its political strategy. Modi’s innings as Gujarat CM began with Godhra. There is no way he will abandon this. Or apologize for it. He thoroughly enjoys the love and affection fellow saffronites shower on him for this (remember he is called the Hindu Hriday Samrat?). But the Muslims have never forgiven the BJP. Nor have the Christians.

How did the Congress make amends? The Congress apologized to the Sikhs. Publicly. In words and in action. Sonia Gandhi made Manmohan Singh the PM even though no one would have given him that chance. The Sikhs felt assuaged. It was the Congress’s way of apologizing; by handing over the most powerful position in the country to a Sikh. Not once, but twice. Of course, there were political reasons that Sonia had for doing so; but she grabbed the chance. Of course, Manmohan Singh’s brilliant record as a bureaucrat; his courageous reforms under Narasimha Rao; his intellectual prowess; and his apolitical nature all made him the “natural” choice. In making Manmohan Singh the PM, Sonia hit two birds with one stone. Not only did she give the nation an able PM (forget what the saffronites think), she also offered an olive branch to the Sikh community.

Did the Sikhs forgive the Congress? Yes. Since 1984, the Sikhs in Punjab voted the Congress to power twice for a total of 10 years; the SAD – the party of the Sikhs – managed only slightly better at thrice for 12 years (before the current tenure started). The loss of the Congress in the recent polls in the state was considered an unexpected result; and was attributed to factors not related to 1984. Had the Congress won Punjab this time (as was expected), it would have been in power longer than the SAD.

The BJP, on the other hand, made no amends. It grudgingly abandoned its hardline Hindutva for a while under coalition compulsions, but now with Modi at the helm, it has very much revived a more vicious version of it. 1) Narendra Modi has never apologized to the Muslims, using guttural language instead, to obfuscate the matter, and even hurt them more (remember the puppy bit?). 2) The BJP routinely abused its police in Gujarat while probing the riots (after having severely abused it during the riots); as well as the state judiciary which had become completely saffronized. Things became so bad that investigative functions had to be handed over to an SC appointed SIT and the CBI; and court hearings had to be moved outside the state. 3) The state continued its persecution of Muslims after 2002. One after another fake encounters was carried out in the state. 4) The state government refused to pony up monies for the restoration of mosques destroyed during the riots (eventually the SC forced it to do so). 5) When the BJP’s Minister of Home during the riots Haren Pandya was murdered, the state made attempts (and succeeded initially) to put the blame on innocent muslims from Hyderabad. All this indicates that the BJP is not contrite. This has helped it win power repeatedly in Gujarat and MP. But it has caused it to lose power everywhere else.

The people have repeatedly punished the BJP for Gujarat. At the Center, the BJP was booted out in 2004 immediatley after the riots (though the BJP expected to win because of its India Shining campaign, just like it thinks it will win now). In UP – where it all started with the demolition of the Babri Masjid in 1992 – the party has never wielded power since the Babri days. In Maharashtra, where the equally saffron Shiv Sena is its ally, the BJP has ruled only once for 4 years since 1995; and never after Godhra. In Bihar, its ally, the JD(U), broke off precisely for Modi’s Gujarat record. If today the BJP is a pariah, it is thanks to its non-contrite image.

The BJP says it is has been fair to the Muslims. It says it made APJ Abdul Kalam the President. That was good; but it looks like an exception never to be repeated. Can we imagine the BJP ever making a Muslim or Christian its party President, forget its PM candidate? In fact, Modi hasn’t even given seats in the state elections to Muslim candidates. He hasn’t done it in the past and he is not going to do it in the future. At the national level, how many Muslim faces does one see in the BJP? Except for a few “show pieces”, none. How many Christian faces are there in the party? None. The BJP is proud of its staunch Hindu character. Even here, it remains exclusivist and strongly Brahminical. The BJP’s inherent nature is to polarize. It polarized the country on the Hindu-Muslim axis. It will polarize Hindus on the Brahmin-others axis in the future. Hindus worry about this. That’s why the lower castes never vote for it.

One last point. BJP supporters also mention the several Hindu-Muslim riots that have taken place in the country since independence in an attempt to shame the Congress and show it is as not secular. But the problem with this is that the people have never blamed the Congress for having caused these riots. That the riots happened is indeed shameful, but they didn’t happen because of the Congress. The BJP on the other hand is accused of having directly caused the Gujarat riots. And Babri. And the encounter killings. And more. All riots are unfortunate but when the CM acts, the casualties are smaller (Assam had less than 100 deaths, UP less than 50). When the CM looks the other way, the numbers are obviously higher (2000 died in Gujarat).

The real truth is that there is no comparison between 2002 and 1984. The Congress remains culturally, religiously and socially heterogeneous; the BJP a Brahminical monolith. The Congress’s heterogeneity forced it to apologize to the Sikhs; the BJP’s homogeneity compels it not to do so to the Muslims. The two parties are incomparable; the two incidents likewise.

Silent Night 
Sigh-lent bright star Anointed Joe

Oh Titiwangsa,a poll’s had won.
you has Waken from slum-ber dee-eep, 
End your con-fu-sion deep.

Sigh-lent UMNO !Deep’ning night! 
PAS quaking at the sight. 
Alarm bells scream from near and afar. 
The allies don’t sing Alleluia. 
Joe the Saviour’bo-orn

Titiwangsa MP Datuk Johari is the fascinating person of 2013

No lists can ever do justice to the personal struggles we all wage, nor to the many whose efforts reach out to touch the lives of millions. And yet we must all have our own list of people we find fascinating because I do believe that in admiring another, we are reaffirming those very strengths and qualities within ourselves. Here are some people I found fascinating in 2013 Everyone of us that has made resolutions either forget them, rarely make them materialise and remember them at the end of the year when it’s time to make new ones. Most people focus on what they want to achieve for themselves, which is not wrong, but is anything worth putting such humungous effort into if it doesn’t translate into a source of great and constant happiness?  When I look around I see the fundamental problem in lives, relationships, work and daily interactions with others is the lack of “niceness”.  We command people, unburden on people, nag people, make idle conversation with people and then of course there are happy times with people too. But a majority of the time I see people with grim or expressionless faces, even sitting across the table eating dinner together at restaurants. Initiate positive conversation, be complementary, help a random stranger and at least once a day resolve to put a smile on someone’s face. It’s a ripple effect and is said, “Smile and the world smiles back at you”. It’s true, what goes around comes around. Everyone thinks they are nice, but being a nice person has no value if you’re not spreading it. And remember, it’s not what you say, but how you say it that matters. Let’s resolve to be “nice” people this year. Not just to ourselves and our loved ones or people we need something from. Let’s be nice to everyone. Let’s just be “genuinely nice” people! Fullstop.

Barisan Nasional Titiwangsa MP Datuk Johari Abdul Ghani said the hike was drastic, adding that City Hall should opt for a gradual hike and benchmark the increase against upgrades in infrastructure and services.

He said any increment needed to match the quality of services provided by City Hall.

“They have to justify the hike with the work they have done.”

itiwangsa MP Datuk Johari Abdul Ghani said City Hall should issue new notices bearing more reasonable increases in the property revaluation, adding that the hike in assessment rates should not be more than 3%, Utusan Malaysia reported today.

The Umno mouthpiece quoted Johari as saying that his proposed hike in the assessment fees was appropriate in view of the country’s inflation rate.

“I believe he (Federal Territories Minister Datuk Seri Tengku Adnan Tengku Mansor) will use his goodwill to reduce the rates, not exceeding five per cent more than the current rate,” Johari said.

Johari also highlighted numerous municipal issues, such as poor street lighting, irregular garbage collection, bad drainage and potholes.

Titiwangsa UMNO story as we have come to call it, was looking good, and the future was imagined as an unbroken chain of shiny happiness. Business felt good about itself, as the state began to leave it more room, and as new markets and categories were opened up. Politics was never a bright spot, but the common perception was that both UMNO regimes performed well enough to keep spirits buoyant. Media was seen to be coming into own as it made the system more accountable. And culturally, occasional brushes with the moral police notwithstanding, the prevailing myth was the one so bewitchingly described - Titiwangsa MP Datuk Johari Abdul Ghani that it was possible to reconcile modernity with tradition, that in fact modern impulses were nothing but a version of purified tradition.The idea of democracy, the meaning that it must deliver today is being re-negotiated in an original way. The certitudes of the past have been revealed to be flawed- what we will embrace are the confusions of the present. New ideas will surprise us and confound us; incomprehension will be a frequent emotion. UMNO Shining has morphed into  Malays agonizing, and that is a not a good sign.

What we are seeing in 2013 is perhaps a fundamental re-imaging of the lofty and abstract ideas that we have received as legacy concepts, that have with time, been hollowed out of meaning. The process of redefining what each of these ideas mean today, and what form should they take involves a ground-up discussion that seems to have begun, at least in some areas. What is the real meaning of democracy and how it can best represent the voice of the people rather than their rulers, what is the nature of power and what must its limits be, what kind of freedoms should an individual enjoy and how must that fit in with the collective nature of shared traditions, how do we renegotiate the terms of engagement between genders and different notions of sexuality, how do we restore faith in old institutions and curb the power of new ones, how do we rediscover a new kind of idealism relevant for the times- all these are questions that are being debated, albeit untidily.The desire for change has taken the most concrete shape in politics where a phenomenon of a new kind has succeeded in capturing the imagination of a section of the country.

Kuantan Wanita Umno chief Datuk Zaiton Mat  to reach stardom,   from UMNO a media spectacle even as it drew attention to the cult status  Kuantan Wanita Umno chief Zaiton Mat’s call for those unhappy with BN’s policies to “leave the country” has drawn scorn This racist remark has been came out These are serious questions with no definite answers

“This country does not belong to Kuantan Wanita Umno chief ,” said Titiwangsa MP Datuk Johari Abdul Ghani from Umno.”So, to ask Malaysians who don’t like BN to get out of Malaysia is uncalled for,” he said, adding that Zaiton’s comment was her personal view and not that of Umno or BN.  a media spectacle even as it drew attention to the cult status

“BN accommodates political ideologies of all races and religions in Malaysia,” said Johari.  UMNO will face some serious challenges in 2014

Pulai MP Datuk Nur Jazlan Mohamed of Umno said while Zaiton has the right to her own opinion, it was best if she kept it to herself if it will hurt others.

Politics was meant to transform society in Malaysia but it seemed as if the reverse was happening.  Notions of secularism, the expansion of the market, the increased representativeness of politics, democracy itself as an idea have all been concepts that have either been imported out of the idealism of a few or have been expedient solutions to pressing and immediate problems. In most cases, there has been little agreement on the desirability and the precise meaning of these nor a full grasp of their implications. As a result, with time, the practice of these ideas have been funnelled through old structures and mindsets, resulting in distortions of the most cynical kind.

The media Star which is an institution that is designed to act as a counterpoint to the forces of power, for sensationalising minister’s comments

The Domestic Trade, Cooperatives and Consumerism Ministry moved to head off more criticisms about price hikes today by ticking off The Star newspaper, saying “such sensationalisation of news and eye-catching headlines should not be at the expense of misinformation that may create the wrong perspective”.

The Star reported Minister Datuk Seri Hasan Malek as saying on Friday that the ministry had not received any complaints and this meant there was support for the price hikes. But the online version of the news report has been now been edited and carries a new headline.

itself became a source of exploitable power and was increasingly used as such. And societally, the easy assumptions about the ability to absorb sweeping changes came unstuck as underlying tensions that had been papered over began to come to the fore. The ugliest manifestation of this tension took the form of increased sexual violence against women, a subject that has occupied centre stage all through this year.

No lists can ever do justice to the personal struggles we all wage, nor to the many whose efforts reach out to touch the lives of millions. And yet we must all have our own list of people we find fascinating because I do believe that in admiring another, we are reaffirming those very strengths and qualities within ourselves. Here are some people I found fascinating in 2013 (in no particular order)Silent Night Sigh-lent bright star Anointed Joe Oh Titiwangsa,a poll’s had won. you has Waken from slum-ber dee-eep, End your con-fu-sion deep. Sigh-lent UMNO !Deep’ning night! PAS quaking at the sight. Alarm bells scream from near and afar. The allies don’t sing Alleluia. Joe the Saviour’bo-orn Joe the meek peoleleader Had a very shiny pose, … Read more

Rare Umno lawmaker in KL, Johari offers chance to rejuvenate UMNO in the Federal Territories keep talking to grassroots rejuvenation of urban Malays
The best New Year greeting has come to me from a friend. It consists of two lines from T S Eliot’s Four Quartets: “For last year’s words belong to last year’s language, And next year’s words await another voice.” We shall see which voice prevails.

become the last hope of in its bitter struggle against the rise Brain dead FT Umno chief Datuk Seri Tengku Adnan Tengku Mansor and FT Umno deputy chief Datuk Raja Nong Chik Raja Zainal Abidin  leaders no longer believe they can win in 2018  they never pursued Pakatan with the ferocity it displays against DAP. This is not merely desire for retribution; it is also evidence of worry. The past few days have been particularly depressing to  UMNO, but Johari  hope that DAP can still be stopped in FT seats  will be a  small change in the larger game.In theory, this strategy has its merits.  Johari has one asset in common. DAP are outsiders who promise to cleanse the gutters of   DBKL corruption would have no answers on electricity rates, water or crime. electricity from corporations, who are even less generous; and the police is run by the Centre. Some battles are better lost.. If  Johari  with an energized urban Malays cadre in support, remains the only claimant to honesty’s mantle,Pakatan could face electoral upheaval. But if  his mantle can be shared with other BN parties, voter focus will not split.FT was the only state to produce a confused result, the city’s mood confirmed an important fact: voters go to the polling booth to elect an alternative government, not only to give vent to anger.Pakatan would have preferred another, quick, election, to maximize the positive surge in their direction. Citizens told him to get on with it, and deliver on promises instead of stretching an alibi. There is a consistent message from ground level. Voters want a stable government.Pakatan cannot offer that at a national level. Nor can Lim Kit Siang promise a coalition, since he considers every other party corrupt. His only rationale for entering Parliament will be that of a security guard service. Good, but possibly not good enough.But there isn’t a gambler in a casino, or in a general election lottery, who will accept defeat before a last throw of dice.

As 2014 shapes up to be a year of increases, Titiwangsa MP Datuk Johari Abdul Ghani is already setting his sights on rising prices that he has been fighting this year.

Despite being a member of the ruling Barisan Nasional (BN) coalition, Johari ― one of just two Umno federal lawmakers in the city ― has been outspoken against the government’s move to cut subsidies and raise taxes, even crossing party lines to oppose a controversial assessment hike here.

He says these should not have come all at once as they would hurt consumer spending and, ultimately, the country’s economy.

“It will become unbearable to the people,” Johari told The Malay Mail Online in a recent phone interview.

“I can understand why the government needs to reduce subsidies, but what I’m saying is that all these increases cannot be done in one go. It has to be done in phases,” he added.

In order to cut its chronic budget deficit to 3 per cent of the economy by 2015, Putrajaya recently reduced fuel subsidies, removed price controls for sugar, and confirmed the introduction of the Goods and Services Tax (GST), all within the space of four months.

Electricity tariffs are set to increase from next month and Kuala Lumpur residents are also in line for an assessment rate hike next year after valuations of their properties were doubled, or tripled in some cases, while public transport charges in the Klang Valley are set to go up further next year.

Putrajaya is also considering increasing the toll rates for various highways throughout the Klang Valley, although this has yet to be confirmed.

“You cannot say if petrol prices go up, ‘don’t drive a car’. We don’t have alternative public transport,” said Johari.

“Our public transport system is not efficient. You can only say that if you have effective public transport like in Melbourne, London or Singapore,” he added.

Johari joined opposition FT lawmakers in opposing the proposed assessment rate hike in the city, pointing out last month that increases to property valuation of between 100 and 300 per cent would render government cash aid meaningless.

Johari says that he will fight against the rising cost of living. — Picture courtesy of Johari Abdul Ghani

When asked to share his biggest achievement this year, Johari said he was proudest of his work to highlight in Parliament the lack of affordable housing in KL for low- to middle-income groups, as well as the spiralling property prices in the Klang Valley.

“This issue later was taken up by the government and they subsequently agreed to allocate more funds and incentives to develop this category of housing in the 2014 Budget, like low-cost houses under KPKT (Ministry of Urban Wellbeing, Housing and Local Government) and SPNB (Syarikat Perumahan Negara Berhad),” he said.

Johari pointed out that Putrajaya has also increased the Real Property Gains Tax (RPGT), during the tabling of Budget 2014 in October, to curb speculation that has driven up property prices beyond the reach of many young people in the city.

You cannot say if petrol prices go up, ‘don’t drive a car’. We don’t have alternative public transport. — Datuk Johari Abdul Ghani 

“Under KPKT, they continue building more PPR houses throughout the country and in the city. But they’re still facing problems in getting suitable land to build PPR in KL,” he said, referring to public housing.

“Even if it’s available, it’s too strategically located, where the land value is more than the price of the PPR. Other land already belongs to developers. That’s why I’m suggesting to DBKL (Kuala Lumpur City Hall) and FT, any land belonging to them, they should not privatise it,” added the acting Umno Titiwangsa chief.

On what Johari failed to accomplish this year, he said that he was unable to resolve the issue of flash floods in his constituency in the city centre.

“I’m going to pursue further to get DBKL and government agencies to seriously look into the matter,” he said.

“The immediate feedback that I got was that they’re allocating some funds on widening the drainage at Dato Keramat, and in Kampung Baru, they’re looking at the water retention pond and also upgrading the pump, in order to contain the flash floods,” added the Umno lawmaker.

 Rare Umno lawmaker in KL,

You probably have heard this before “Nice people finish last” and perhaps have experienced it as well – watching pushy, inconsiderate individuals get the job you wanted or have received the romantic attention of someone you have been pining for. It didn’t seem fair, did it?

If you have observed this rare breed, called ‘nice people’, closely and understood what they had to offer –integrity, compassion, protection, support, passion, & possibly lots more, you’d be confused; why, despite having these attributes, are they simply walked over and cast aside in everyday relationships!

Look inside an office and you’ll see that you don’t have to be ‘the boss’ to take on a leadership role. If you are one with the most experience in a certain skill, you’ll have, at least in a few key moments, the opportunity to become the ‘leader’ and guide your team. That’s a no brainer right there, isn’t it?

Psychological studies in this area have been fascinating. They have helped us understand the connect between the ability to lead, when necessary, and the achievement of professional success; taunting us to the ever unanswered question: Do nice guys really finish last in life?

Though difficult to predict, evidence shows that ‘nice guys’ typically earn less than their more aggressive colleagues. And while you may agree, aggressive people are often perceived as ‘jerks’, studies do not suggest that you become one to get ahead in life, rather they suggest that highly agreeable men need to watch the outcome of their assertiveness when it comes to their work. Especially, assertiveness, that relates more closely to taking on the role of a ‘leader’.

Let’s analyze why this happens and what you – the nice guy, can do about it.

With research proving, at least statistically, that nice guys earn less than their aggressive peers, it shows a strong negative relationship between  ‘agreeableness’ and the income for men. The more agreeable a person is, the lesser will be the earnings!

In everyday life, outside of the workplace, the being ‘agreeable’ trait is considered as a positive characteristic – of being warm, sympathetic, kind and cooperative. When the nice guy is an agreeable person, he is an ideal person to spend time with. He will allow people to come into his life, and will agree with them on everything. It’s so important for people to like him, so he’s Mr. Agreeable all along.

While there’s nothing wrong with being nice, but when you’re so nice to everyone, you stop being nice to yourself and your efforts can backfire.

This unique duality exists because disagreeable men, in competitive, work environment, are viewed as tough negotiators, and are those who stick to their vision, unfortunately though, women don’t receive the same benefit in terms of how they are viewed. The general perception being – if a woman is agreeable, she may be taken advantage of, and if she is disagreeable, she is considered a control freak. Therefore, even though being ‘disagreeable’ may not seem too ideal a scenario, being too agreeable is viewed as a sign of weakness and perceived as a flaky personality, lacking in confidence and conviction.

But having seen that, if being an agreeable person is highly desired, how can a balance be found? Is there any direct connect between being assertive and the qualities associated with higher earnings and work-related success?

I believe the answer lies in analyzing – what fills up the high-earning positions, not just those of ‘the boss’ – but that of the leader.

When we begin examining the qualities of leadership as a whole, which can include men or women, we look past the gender bias, and focus on the qualities that are more universally applicable in the workplace. By examining these qualities that have strong connections with leadership, we can see where ‘nice guys’ may be going wrong, and find out what it really takes to lead others and advance in a competitive environment.

Let’s dig deeper …

Decisiveness – When we witness someone making and sticking to their decisions, we subconsciously associate them with responsibility, and they are more likely to be perceived as leaders. Leaders often have the first-mover advantage in many decision making situations, as being one with the most conviction of creating a self-reinforcing cycle that leads to the development of certain kinds of collective beliefs within their team members.

Vision – A natural compliment to decision making, vision defines the road map, and the leader does more than just shout their opinion the loudest—they are best at articulating their thoughts one by one and justify how things are going to fall in, in a group, for instance.

However, when we regard speaking in a group, research has found brainstorming as an ineffective method for coming up with ideas. Agreeable people can be anxious about being negatively evaluated and be apprehensive about having their thoughts judged by others, and undergo social loafing – deliberately exert less effort to achieve a goal, where the reliance is on the group for ideas instead of voluntarily putting forth their own.

Persistence – While being persistent does emphasize on the need to convince, there are certainly some differences between the typical ‘agreeable’ and a persistent personality. Nice guys, the agreeable ones, use the tactic of voicing their opinion just for the sake of argument, thereby playing the devil’s advocate, when they want to disagree. Although it may seem that being the devil’s advocate allows nice guys to keep pushing for their opinion without hurting any feelings, often this tactic backfires, as it generally strengthens the group’s opinion on the original argument!

On the other hand, the persistent person by virtue of his articulate nature, would actually be listened to much more closely and evaluated for much longer, because a majority will at least seek to understand the opposing argument, before dismissing it.

It therefore becomes imperative for nice guys to not only be persistent in their efforts towards greatness, but also need to learn ‘when to hold’ and ‘when to fold’, and if they are confident of their idea or argument, they need to push for it without trying to please everyone.

Do you agree?

related article

Silent Night  Sigh-lent bright star Anointed Joe Oh Titiwangsa,a poll’s had won. you has Waken from slum-ber dee-eep,  End your con-fu-sion deep. Sigh-lent UMNO !Deep’ning night!  PAS quaking at the sight.  Alarm bells scream from near and afar.  The allies don’t sing Alleluia.  Joe the Saviour’bo-orn Titiwangsa MP Datuk Johari is the fascinating person of 2013 … Read more TITIWANGSA MP DATUK JOHARI SAID 2013 YEAR OF LIVING DANGEROUSLY BEEN A TUMULTUOUS FOR UMNO

Against a dark economic backdrop, if ever the idiom ‘too clever by half’ were to apply to anyone, The Performance Management Delivery Unit (Pemandu)   and its ‘master-strategists’ in Putra Jaya UMNO insiders argue that the suicidal move to support. Najibl has emerged as a master of ‘perception-politics.’ If Najibl achieves even 25% of what he has promised in his election manifesto – or for that matter, even creates the perception that his intentions are genuine –He has succeeded in capturing the imagination ofMalaysia’s voters and his guerilla-style of functioning has amazed even his harshest critics, such as myself. The Performance Management Delivery Unit  government is actually an ‘astute’ political strategy. They believe, or at least hope, that  The Performance Management Delivery Unit  will fail to deliver on their promises – thus betraying the trust of voters. At this opportune juncture, theenemies of Najib will safely pull the plug on hisPrime Ministership  and surely Najib and his merry-men will pay the ultimate political price.

ACCOUNTABILITY is an infrequently used word in Malaysian authorities’ lexicon. Regulators’ persistent refusal to determine who was responsible for a mishap is effectively a denial of accountability. If allowed to continue, this no-fault syndrome could stymie Malaysia’s progress.

What  more (Pemandu)  new ideasi to ease the rakyat’s burden and put mechanisms in place to cushion the public from rises in electricity and toll rates.The question is, how and why did they commit the same blunder a second time?  power-tariff claims may not be too off the mark. By tweaking operational efficiencies and renegotiating existing power-purchase agreements, he can certainly reduce the current power tariffs. Whether he can hit the magical 50% number is highly unlikely. But the important point to note is that any reduction at a time of price-rise and ceaseless inflation is certain to have a major impact on the household budgetary expenses of city ’s middle-class population.

Najib said the recent financial crisis was a warning about the serious consequences for nations whose finances were not built on a solid foundation.

“If investors and credit rating agencies decide that a country cannot afford to repay its debt, the cost of borrowing money will spiral out of control.”

“Without access to credit, there will be huge implications for a country and its people,” Najib said, pointing out that more than half of the young people in Europe were unemployed.

“Our commitment to development expenditure has grown and we must manage our fiscal position to ensure the stability of Malaysia’s economy” he said.

Najib said difficult decisions had to be taken to keep the country’s borrowings low and maintain investor confidence, which was crucial to keep Malaysia’s economy strong and growing.

However, he assured the public that Putrajaya would do everything it could to ensure that the impact on the rakyat was minimised.The new media which is an institution that is designed to act as a counterpoint to the forces of power, itself became a source of exploitable power and was increasingly used as such. And societally, the easy assumptions about the ability to absorb sweeping changes came unstuck as underlying tensions that had been papered over began to come to the fore.

Recognising that for the past two years Malaysians have been facing a host of uncertainties, especially in the political realm, we enter 2014 with a sense of apprehension; for the New Year comes with its own set of concerns.

2013 is coming to an end. It started highly charged on issues surrounding the 13th General Election; which witnessed Barisan Nasional retaining their power for the next 5 years. Various promises were made. Sweeteners were sprinkled to hood the public into believing that a better future holds in the coming months and years.

Nevertheless, barely 6 months into regaining Putrajaya, all hopes of joy and dreams of the rakyat to enjoy their hard eared money have been shattered in the wake of escalated cost of living. The government has made their promises sour in taste by announcing various prices hikes of goods and services as the closure to the year.

The public by large are flabbergasted in the manner policies are being hammered through, that will take toll on their incomes directly.

In the name of subsidy rationalisation and strengthening fiscal position, Prime Minister Najib Tun Razak has not left any stone unturned in ‘punishing’ the people of Malaysia by upping prices on daily essentials. First it was the hike in fuel price by 20 sen. Well as usual his justification was that we have one of the lowest priced fuel in the region. So subsidising it heavily does not make sense.

Then the sugar subsidy was removed. Again a very unsubstantiated, flimsy and lame excuse was used. Apparently the number of diabetics are on the rise because the government is subsidising sugar, thus the need for the move. What a genius deduction made by a person who has pretty much lost touch with the reality indeed.

But Najib was still not too appeased with the savings as he felt that more needs to be done to ‘safeguard’ the  interest of the public. Thus we are bracing a further rate hike on highway tolls and electricity in 2014.

And as icing, there is near confirmed possibility of hike in school bus and public transport fares. Taxis, buses, trains, and the LRT will all cost more in the coming year.A timely Christmas and New Year gift from Putrajaya for 2014.

As cumulative consequences and in definite terms, the overall cost of living will only spiral up as production of goods and services will also cost more. The entire supply chain  will not be spared and eventually the cost will drop flat on the laps of the consumers.

The hardest hit will be the middle income group which is already in a limbo with the current economic situation. Wages have not seen significant changes in parallel to inflation. The power of each ringgit has shrunk in its capacity over the years. It is baffling as to what is defined as a high income nation in the eye of the Malaysian government when in actual sense the purchasing power does not improve with time.

Consumers will need to dig in deeper into their pockets come 2014. A chunk of their salaries will go to paying higher current bills for sustenance; thus what will be left for savings will demand sharp juggling skills.

With a gloomy outlook on the global economic front coming ahead next year, it will be a much tougher battle to handle.

With many drawing up their New Year’s resolutions for 2014, please do keep in mind that financial prudence is highly recommended to be on the top of the list. That little pay increment or bonus one may obtain should be spread thin and well to cover any other surprises that BN may further spring on us.With the likelihood of a significant rise in living costs, unresolved religious issues, trepidations over the apparent lack of freedom in mass media as well as issues pertaining to human rights, it is easy to understand the people’s anxieties in what the coming year shall bring.

It can thus be said that some of us will leave 2013 feeling hurt. But it is worth noting that a new year also opens up a chance for healing. We at the Global Movement of Moderates (GMM) propose that all stakeholders, especially the civil society, to band together to help make 2014 better than the sombre year most are anticipating.

As an organisation, we look forward to contributing in several areas which include, but are not limited to, bipartisan politics, good governance, human rights, religious tolerance, inclusive development as well as unity. We believe that with concentrated efforts in these areas, a better year can be realised.

We also call upon the Malaysian government to review some of the decisions made so as not to add to the hardships that most of the people are already facing thus far. We believe that Malaysians are generally reasonable people. They would be able to appreciate the challenges that we as a country would have to face together, if the approaches used, policies implemented and programmes undertaken are of reasonable nature. It is when the people deem some of the government’s actions as unreasonable that they will start to feel discontent.

In this context, we applaud the announcement made by Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Razak, outlining 11 steps of cost saving to be made by ministers, senior civil servants and government agencies. It is a step in the right direction.

Besides that, we would like the government to do more, for example, in fully utilising comprehensive Spend Management Technologies like e-procurement and e-bidding, which is a systematic way to further save cost and curb corruption.It is pertinent for us to believe that a better 2014 is achievable for Malaysia. A better Malaysia in 2014 is a win-win situation for all the parties involved. In the international front, it can put us in a better position before 2015, a year in which we will chair Asean as well as become a candidate for a non-permanent seat in the United Nation’s Security Council, thus paving the way for us to play a greater role in the international community. But for this to happen, it is crucial that local concerns are given due attention. As the adage goes, a house divided against itself cannot stand. –

Putrajaya’s economic czar Datuk Seri Abdul Wahid Omar Activists are today questioning  For Malayan Banking, despite the inflated price it paid for by Abdul Wahid Omar Putrajaya’s economic czar  its Indonesian operations some time back Seldom has a year begun with so much buzz. We have finally figured that politics is far too important to be left to thugs, scoundrels, scamps and scallywags. People are coming out in thousands to  Change.But that was another time, another season. Najib is not half as ruthless as Mahathir. But its glaring ineptitude and unbridled corruption has made it one of the most despised regimes ever. Seldom before in history has a worse bunch of people come together to run the affairs of this nation with such roaring incompetence. Yet management of the coalition is nothing short of brilliant. It manages to stay in power despite all scams, scandals, stolen billions. But in the process,  Malaysia has missed its best opportunities. Its image lies in tatters. The scene’s so bad that for a while it appeared we had reconciled ourselves to  someone had to clean up the mess. ClearlyNajib wasn’t up to it.UMNO back into reckoning? Questions. Questions. Questions.If all else fails, UMNO has one last option. There’s a man sitting in Putra Jaya who can, in a jiffy, put Humpty Dumpty together again. And more important, he has friends in all parties. But the question is: Can they cajole him to re-enter the game?Yet there was a time when Governments teetered at every scam. RememberPKFZ scandal,  Remember the stock market scam? Remember Telcsi? Or the more recent scam where all the money for rural irrigation was looted while Rosmah son espensive property in New York  .

No, corruption is not new to our politics. It’s been around from Mahathir’s time.  For the world outside, Malaysia is a hotbed of corruption where no deal is ever struck without some politician (or his middle man) getting paid for it. Even the coffins that picked up our dead soldiers  in Mahathir’s time were scam tainted.hell of making it alone. Both are stubbornly silent on corruption. And we? Frankly, my dear, we don’t give a damn. We outrage a bit. We joke a bit on social media and it’s all over. Life’s back to normal. The moment small fish is convicted by the court and sent to jail for the fodder scam, his popularity ratings shoot up in the polls. The man who was cowering out of fear is now beating his chest as a challenger to Najib. Such is the power of corruption in Malaysia. It makes Mahathirheroeout of the biggest rascals.

he wife of the PM, Rosmah Mansor, is apparently advocating that every Malaysian school child should be shown the newly released Leonardo di Caprio film, The Wolf of Wall Street, in order to warn them against greed and immorality.

One wonders how she proposes to get around the fact that the film has been X-rated owing to the violence and sex scenes, which extend to drug taking and mass orgies?

The makers of the film reportedly tempted director Martin Scorcese onto the project by allowing him a free hand to make the movie as hard core as he liked, thereby limiting audiences in America to over 17 unless accompanied by a suitable adult.

There is also the question of cost.

In some schools in Sarawak children sleep side by side on the floor under leaking roofs, owing to cash restraints.

Yet mass screenings of a top new movie would presumably involve paying out scarce funds to the production company.

Disrespectful? The Malaysian funded depiction of greed and debauchery on Wall Street was launched on Christmas Day in the US.

Perhaps the powerful wife of the PM figures that at least the production company is Malaysian owned, so that the public money would be supporting a local enterprise?

More specifically, the production company behind The Wolf on Wall Street, Red Granite Pictures, is headed and financed by her own son Riza Aziz (Riza Shahriz Bin Abdul Aziz).

Red Granite was founded by Aziz in 2010 and has already bankrolled a number of big name projects, including ‘Friends With Kids’ and ‘Dumb and Dumber To ‘, as well as The Wolf of Wall Street, which had been dropped by mainstream studios.

In the case of The Wolf of Wall Street the reasons for dropping the movie was its disgusting content – Scorcese was heckled at a recent Academy showing, according to reports, with the words “shame on you“!

Copious sex, drugs and violence – movie bankrollers Red Granite include Riza Aziz (right)

Where did the money come from?

How Riza Aziz emerged as a major bankroller of Hollywood movies is of obvious interest. Could it be linked to his family position and circle of associates?

Jho Low the partying ‘billionaire’

It has already been noted that Najib Razak’s step-son, is a close associate of the controversial and flamboyant financier Jho Low (Low Taek Jho) a Penang business graduate educated in the UK and US, who has acted as the front man in a number of eyebrow-raising business deals linked both to Taib Mahmud in Sarawak and Najib’s pet project the 1 Malaysia Development Berhad.

Indeed, Jho Low’s series of notorious antics, distributing Crystal Champagne around the world’s top nightclubs and lavishing vast sums on famous women like Paris Hilton and Taiwanese pop star Elva Hsiao, suggest a remarkably similar animal to the character supposedly deplored in the film, the jailed Wall Street financier Jordan Belfort (although Sarawak Report would not wish to imply that any of themisconduct depicted in the film applies to Mr Low).

Low was prominent at the launch party for the film, posing next to Riza Aziz and his partner in Red Granite Pictures, the Kentuky ‘private equity cowboy’, Joey Mcfarland, on stage at the event, which will further fuel speculation over possible links.

Red Granite Picture’s Riza Aziz and Joey Mcfarland with finance ‘whiz kid’ Jho Low at the launch of Wolf Of Wall Street

Mega Finance linked to Malaysia

The Hollywood coverage of the fast trajectory of Red Granite Pictures from nowhere in 2010 to a “top company to watch” in just three years has made no bones about the supposedly deep pockets of Riza Aziz, widely described as the ‘son of the Malaysian Prime Minister’.

This was how the New York Magazine’s ‘Vulture’ section put it back in 2012:

“For days now, talent agencies have buzzed with the news that Leonardo DiCaprio might be finally committing to star in The Wolf of Wall Street for director Martin Scorsese, a project that was first reported exclusively by Vulture almost a year ago today. Then, earlier this morning, Deadline carried the news that the funding had at last been locked into place, courtesy of Wall Street big-shots themselves: Riza Aziz, a former HSBC investment banker from London, and Joey McFarland, a private equity cowboy from Kentucky. Their Red Granite Pictures will be fully financing the feature adaptation of Jordan Belfort’s memoir of his boozy, debauchery-rich journey to multimillionaire in the Reagan eighties to federal convict..”[Vulture 3/15/12]

The Hollywood Reporter described Red Granite Picture’s launch party in Cannes as “one of the hottest parties in years”, describing the up-coming Wolf of Wall Street as a $100 million dollar film. They boast a rare interview with Aziz, which for Malaysians provides some fascinating information:

“Red Granite was formed by Riza Aziz — the 35-year-old son of Malaysian Prime Minster Tun Abdul Razak and among the new generation of film financiers flocking to Hollywood — andJoey McFarland, 40… In one of the few interviews they’ve given, Aziz and McFarland, both with a background in finance, spoke with The Hollywood Reporter about how they’ve spent the last year, their plans for the company and their determination to stay on budget with Wolf…..

Aziz: We’d like to make three to five films a year, with one tentpole and two or three films with more modest budgets in the $20 million to $40 million range.

THR: How much money are you backed by?

McFarland: We do not talk about that.

Aziz: I will say that I have money invested in the company. It shows that I have skin in the game and am committed from a financial point of view. We also have a group of investors, mainly from the Middle East and Asia.

THR: What does your father think of your new venture?

Aziz: I have leeway, but he likes to know that the projects we do have pedigree.[Hollywood Reporter]

Sarawak Report suggests that the above remarks by Najib’s step-son imply strongly that his money is family money and that he is to an extent accountable to his ‘father’ the Prime Minister, who gives him ‘leeway’.

Aziz (left) in a family pose with Rosmah and siblings

If Malaysia was blessed with a free media this would be enough to provoke a barrage of questions as to exactly how the son of Rosmah Mansor has acquired these hundreds of millions of dollars to flush through major Hollywood movies?

Because, if the money is Najib’s, how did the PM get to be so rich?

This is unlikely to be a comfortable subject for the Malaysian BN leader, who is heavily caught up in the Scorpene Submarine kickback scandal that is soon due to appear in a French court over the payments of €119million to a Malaysian company run by his personal negotiator on the deal, Razak Baginda.

Alternatively, there is a lot of reference in the Hollywood Press to Mr Aziz’s own personal fortune, allegedly made as an investment banker in the UK.  This is how Riza Aziz described his money-making career as an investment banker to the Hollywood Reporter:

THR: Riza, you come from a political dynasty. How did you get from Malaysia to Hollywood?

Aziz: My background is in finance and I was in London for close to 10 years. I took a sabbatical from all the chaos that was happening in 2008 and decided to travel the world. I came to the U.S. and was offered the opportunity to get involved in a lot of different things business-wise, and one of them was to be involved in a film with some friends. From that one project, more kept coming in, so we decided to have a company. We began building the team and I brought Joey in at an early stage.

So could Aziz have made the money himself?

Sarawak Report has researched Riza Aziz’s banking career after leaving the London School of Economics in the year 2000.  It appears that he worked with the management consultants KPMG for two years till 2002 and then at HSBC London from 2005 until the financial crash in 2008:

Multi-million dollar investment banker’s CV?

According to the Financial Services Authority, Riza Aziz was employed in a relatively minor role at HSBC for five years, although Aziz himself says he resigned in 2008.  It is a perfectly respectable CV, but for a man who didn’t inherit family money from his mother or father (who worked as a bureaucrat) his ‘investment banking career’ does not explain the source of his finances.

‘Investment banker’, Riza Aziz

Yet flush with cash the young Malaysian most undoubtedly now is, raising comment even in the capitalists’ capital of New York, where he recently bought a flash 7 bedroom home for $39million in a smart zone of town.

Big spending Aziz makes no secret of his connections in Malaysia

Reports on the purchase once again refer to the unconvincing ‘investment banker’ explanation for Aziz’s money:

“Aziz, who reportedly makes his money as an investment banker, has been pegged as a producer to watch. He is one of a new generation of film financiers making their mark in Hollywood, according to a recent story in Variety.” [The Real Deal]

Mystery Malaysian investment – the Jho Low connection?

However, other Hollywood newspapers speak of a separate form of income entirely, in the form of third party investors.

Big money buy outs of movie projects that other studios decided were too dangerous to handle

For example, The Los Angeles Times refers to “undisclosed investors in the Middle East and Asia”.

If so, these investors are mighty trusting.

Red Granite Picture’s business model is one that may very well bring success, if it bets on the right movies.  However, it clearly demands an ability to be able to risk enormous sums of money up-front.

The LA Times repeats the narrative that Red Pictures buys up promising production projects that other studios have dropped, because they have become too fraught and dangerous:

“Where movie studios see trouble, Red Granite Pictures sees opportunities”, the paper says. It continues:

“The new finance and distribution company’s business plan is both contrary and simple: Make the films the studios don’t.

Among its first projects are Martin Scorsese’s “The Wolf of Wall Street,” which comes out Wednesday, and next year’s “Dumb and Dumber To,” the intentionally misspelled sequel to the 1994 comedy.

On the surface, those pictures don’t exactly seem like the sort that a major studio would cast aside.

But both were complicated projects, fraught with thorny issues. Red Granite’s founders, Riza Aziz and Joey McFarland, said they thrive in these sorts of scenarios.

“One of our sweet spots is movies that have died in the studios — movies that are just great product that everyone was hot on but for some reason or another just didn’t make it to the greenlight stage,” said McFarland,41, a Louisville, Ky., native who is Red Granite’s vice chairman. [Los Angeles Times 24/12/13]

It all gives the impression of young men with breath-taking self-confidence and more importantly money to burn. Co-producer Joey McFarland has confirmed that the money comes not thanks to him, but Riza Aziz.

Joey Mcfarland’s movie ambitions were made possible by Malaysian money and Riza Aziz

The recent LA Times article continues:

“Every movie is different,” said Aziz, 37, who is the son of Malaysian Prime Minister Najib Razak. “We are very flexible in the model we [can] pursue.”

Red Granite raises money from a pool of undisclosed investors in the Middle East and Asia, and finances its movies on a one-off basis. The company is able to greenlight a picture without a distribution deal in place. But because it doesn’t have a fund it can tap, Red Granite must convince its investors that an individual project is worth the risk, rather than having the comfort of money to underwrite an entire slate.”

It is surely interesting for Malaysians to know that the PM’s step-son has such access to enormous funds for such enormous risks. There is talk in KL that a number of Malaysian companies are among those who have been encouraged to put money into Wolf of Wall Street. One can only speculate as to why they might have felt pressured to do so.

Meanwhile, it also seems valid to ask whether the peculiar financial background of his close friend the 28 year old Jho Low (described as a “billionaire” in a number of American news reports) be linked to this financial muscle?

The flamboyant financier’s own interest in the movies and friendship with Di Caprio certainly pre-dates Red Granite Pictures.

Partying Paris Hilton at San Tropez

If so, it throws a new perspective onto Jho Low’s links with Najib Razak’s pet project 1MDB Malaysia, the development berhad, which has raised billions through undisclosed, private bonds arranged by, amongst others, Goldman Sachs.

1MDB’s investments have been increasingly controversial, focusing mainly on buying up ageing power companies, which appear to be of questionable value in developing the state of Malaysia.

One of the investors involved in 1MDB is the low profile Middle Eastern venture Petro-Saudi, who were also the buyers when the Taib family sold out of their controversial stake in UBG bank  back in 2011.

Jho Low himself had earlier become involved in UBG, coming onto the board as a Director in 2008 after a major share prchase on behalf of the Abu Dhabi owned company Majestic Masterpiece.

The young man makes much of his fantastic connections, both in Hollywood and the Middle East (particularly Abu Dhabi) allegedly made through networking as a Harrow schoolboy and at Wharton Business School in the US.

But it is his ostentatious high living that has mainly brought Jho Low to the attention of the Malaysian public.  It was he who apparently topped the record for high spending in a New York nightclub, buying champagne for all the assembled guests.

Jho Low also astonished onlookers with the sheer lavishness of a party put on for a girlfriend on a yacht in Taiwan and again drew attention when he partied Paris Hilton with jaw dropping extravagance.

So, could Jho Low be the organiser assisting in the financing of Red Granite Pictures and is that why he was so prominent at the launch and at Leonardo di Caprio’s recent birthday bash?

One of the ‘billionaires’, 20 something Jho Low owns Jynwel Capital

In which case, many may wonder if the link to the top political players in Malaysia and friendship with the PM’s step-son might account for Jho Low’s easy access to investment income or indeed if he is the front man for others?

Court action

Meanwhile, it is not all praise from the Hollywood establishment. One major production company, Motion Picture Corporation of America (MPCA), is suing Red Granite Pictures for a breach of covenant over the other major movie it has ‘bought out of trouble’, the sequel to the popular 90s comedy Dumb and Dumber.

The on-going case has been widely covered in the media and MPCA is far from complimentary about the skills and know how of the brash new-comers who bought up their original idea:

“using money from the Malaysian PM’s family to squeeze them out”..

In their legal deposition the veteran producers Steve Stabler and Brad Krevoy who own MPCA have harsh words for Aziz and Mcfarland, who they say owe them hundreds of thousands for the original work on the film:

“McFarland and [Aziz] lack the experience necessary to successfully produce motion pictures themselves. Although Red Granite apparently has family money from [Aziz], Red Granite will not succeed with money alone because McFarland and [Aziz]‘s experience producing motion pictures during their short tenure in the industry consists of cavorting at nightclubs with Paris Hilton and making dinner reservations at posh nightclubs in New York and Los Angeles.” [Legal deposition against Red Granite Pictures]

“Macfarland and Aziz’s misconduct and hubris will cause Red Granite to crash and burn”

It is an attack that strengthens the apparent links with Jho Low. Malaysians will be interested to see that the very parties attended by Jho Low appear to have also been linked to Riza Aziz, according to this deposition.

Surely, in the name of accountability and transparency Malaysians are due an clear explanation as to the links between the two men and whether Najib Razak is involved?

Appealing to greed and envy?

This is not least because of the large and controversial public loans that have been raised on behalf of Najib (who is also Finance Minister) and his 1MDB development berhad, in which Jho Low is so widely reported to have been involved.

Glamourising greed?

Sarawak Report would finally like to also point out that not everyone is likely to interpret the film as a moral lesson, in the manner apparently suggested by Rosmah Mansor.

In fact, Wolf of Wall Street is likely to be a success for the very reason that it glamourises high spending greed and ostentation.

People are likely to flock to see Leonardo di Caprio making billions in corrupt deals and indulging in immoral behaviour, not to be taught the evils of big money but to escape into the make-believe world of unlimited wealth.

Films like this, it is widely argued, do not bring a Christmas message. To the contrary they encourage more people to try their luck in the world of unscrupulous finance.  This is how the magazine GQ sums up the project:

“When Wall Street came out in 1987, it famously inspired certain people to go into banking, despite its deplorable subject matter. With that in mind, the impressionable might want to stay away from Martin Scorsese’s The Wolf Of Wall Street: from the trailer alone, there’s enough ostentatious displays of wealth to drive another financial crisis. Strippers, dwarves, Ferraris, Jags, $26,000 meals (“it was the sides”) and enough money to throw off yachts and still have plenty spare. The performances also look incredible, with Jonah Hill particularly eye-catching as Leonardo DiCaprio’s naïve assistant. Consider next year’s Oscar race well underway.”

Quite so. As the box office profits roll in for this production, based on greed and immorality, Red Granite Pictures will stand charged of exploiting and glamourising greed, not confronting it.

Given that ill-gotten wealth, ostentatious living and mysterious business links underpin so much of Malaysia’s ruling BN regime, it seems a suitable topic for Red Granite’s first major foray into the film business.

Although, that irony is doubtless entirely lost on the famously extravagant Rosmah Mansor.

With Adam Scott from Red Granite’s first money spinner “Friends With Kids”

related article

Everyone knows that Rosmah is the most powerful individual in Malaysia now. But how little one knows about her. , despite being the fountainhead of two successive Marriage, remains an enigma wrapped in a riddle to many. UMNO men fear her, revere her. And there are many who loath her and consider her aicon, after …Read more

‘What about about about your conspiracy, money power ,media power to force  Najib to step down the 59-year-old Najib would be the latest casualtyIt looks like Malaysia will be getting a new prime minister even before the G14 general election, case that has led to outrage  and evoked an sympathetic reaction in UMNO is a classic case of … Read more

This is the first PM of Malaysia ever to use sexual intonations in many of his important speeches. It is not what you eat that reflects the spirituality of man but what foul comes out of the mouth.The newly elected top leaders have too much baggage to fight without fear or favour within BN. Najib … Read more

There is much that is disturbing, if not outright shocking about the judgment and appeal in the Anwar Ibrahim case. It is not just that the evidence used to convict Anwar is circumstantial at best, but it is in the manner in which speculative conjecture has become bland certitude and airy theories have been taken to be established facts. One expects of the media of the day, but for the the Prosecution Division of the Attorney General’s Chambers (AGC) to do this and for the court to accept it is bizarre. Here is a case where neither the motive has been established nor is there any clarity about the Penetration. There are no witnesses not only to the crime to any of the elements of the theory- in particular there is absolutely nothing to suggest that there was any relationship between Saiful and Anwar. For such a far-fetched idea to be accepted without a shred of evidence as the central premise of this crime is absurd. In the reasons listed by in defence of its judgement the Prosecution Division of the Attorney General’s Chambers (AGC) one blandly states ‘the motive of the commission of the crime has been established’. Nothing could be farther from the truth- in fact there is no proofthat the Penetration took place whatsoever that, even that is pure conjecture.

Allegations that the Prosecution Division of the Attorney General’s Chambers (AGC) is weak and incapable, especially in handling high profile cases are unfounded and unsubstantiated, said Attorney General Tan Sri Abdul Gani Patail (pic).

He said the chambers took note and fully appreciated the concerns of the general public.

He pointed out that whether a certain person is charged, depended solely on whether there existed sufficient evidence to prove the charge against the accused.

“Upon charging, Deputy Public Prosecutors will then present the available and admissible evidence to prove the prosecution’s case. What has to be stressed here is that no evidence necessary to prove the charge will be left out.

“The duty to tender all evidence also includes the calling of all essential witnesses. This, however, is wholly dependent upon the availability and cooperativeness of the witnesses in giving their testimony in court,” stressed Abdul Gani in a media statement, today.

The refusal by the AG’s Chambers to release some evidence requested by the defence team in the Sodomy 2 trial – and the consequent refusal by the Court of Appeal and the Federal Court to order the release of such evidence – brings to the fore questions pertaining to the right to a fair trial, degree of professionalism of the prosecution team and the administration of criminal justice in Malaysia. – See more at:

He further pointed out that whether a witness truthfully testifies, however, was not within the power of the prosecutors.

“What matters here is that we never embellish or fabricate evidence and what we ultimately do, should a witness turn hostile, is to impeach him and in turn charge him for perjury,” added Abdul Gani.

The Attorney-General’s Chambers has filed an appeal against the Kuala Lumpur High Court decision in acquitting Opposition Leader Anwar Ibrahim on the charge of sodomising his former aide.

The notice of appeal was filed in the Criminal Registry of the Kuala Lumpur High Court at 4.30pm today. This was confirmed by Deputy Registrar Halilah Suboh.

High Court judge Zabidin Mohd Diah had on January 9 found Anwar not guilty of sodomising his 23-year-old former aide, Mohd Saiful Bukhari Azlan. Justice Zabidin in acquitting the 64-year-old de facto PKR leader and Permatang Pauh MP, cast doubton the DNA evidence provided by the prosecution.

“After going through the evidence, I cannot be 100 percent certain that the evidence can be accepted as there could have been tampering.Hence, the court is reluctant to convict on such corroboration of evidence from (Saiful) and the accused is acquitted,” the judge had said.

He said it was also necessary to reiterate that once all evidence of the prosecution case were presented, it was then left to the court to decide on whether the charge had been proven against the accused.

“How and what the courts decide is a matter beyond our control and power. Nevertheless, if we are of the view that the decision is flawed, we will exercise our right to appeal,” assured Abdul Gani.

Defence lawyer:  I was not notified

With the filing of the notice of appeal, the prosecution will have wait for Justice Zabidin to complete his written judgment. However, there is no time frame for the judge to do so.

When that is done, the A-G’s Chambers will then file a petition of appeal in the Court of Appeal, which will set a date to hear the appeal.

Anwar’s lawyer Sankara Nair (left) said in a statement this evening that he had not been formally notified of the appeal by the prosecution.

“However, if it is true, then it is most regrettable and atrocious – given that the trial judge has stated succinctly, in his verdict, that the crucial evidence could have been ‘tampered’ with.

“Hence, the substratum of the prosecution’s case is fatally demolished, rendering any appeal, no matter how many times, a desperate act in futility. It appears to be a case of political persecution of Anwar, and not prosecution,” Sankara added in his immediate response.

On the appointment of deputy public prosecutors (DPPs), he explained that cases were assigned to DPPs according to the complexities and intricacies present in the case at hand, whereby cases which involve a higher degree of complexity will be handled by senior DPPs.

In the media statement, Abdul Gani also touched on the difficulties faced by the AGC especially in high profile cases, including the Altantuya Shaaribuu murder case, where the main grounds of acquittal by the Court of Appeal were the non-directions of the trial judge on issues raised by the appellants and the non-calling of DSP Musa Safri.

He said that while respecting the Court of Appeal, non-direction or misdirection of the trial court should not be attributed to the prosecution “as it had nothing to do with the conduct of the prosecution”.

He said that the AGC maintained that Musa’s testimony sheds no relevance to the narrative of the prosecution’s case.

“Hence, this Office has filed an appeal to the Federal Court,” he said.

Meanwhile, on the acquittal of former Transport Minister Tun Dr Ling Liong Sik on a cheating case based on testimonies of two ex-ministers and former prime minister Tun Dr Mahathir Mohamad, Abdul Gani said the court had held that there was no element of concealment, deception, misrepresentation or inducement on the part of the accused with regards to the purchase of said land.

“This ruling was evidently a finding of fact based on the credibility of the former ministers.

“The Court ruled that based on the former ministers’ interpretation, it was highly unlikely that the Cabinet had been falsely induced to approve the purchase of the land,” said Abdul Gani, adding that it would be trite to appeal the decision as it would be difficult to argue that the Court had erred in its finding of fact.readmoreOn the face of it, it’s difficult to figure why Anwar is treated as a heinous offender by the  Malaysian criminal justice system because, according to his prosecutors But , Muhammad Shafee celebrity federal prosecutor currently pursuing Anwar with great ferocity, is hardly going after friends of Mahathir and Najib  of a large number on this … Read more